Weary Wednesday

I love my sleep and I'm not too happy when I don't get it. I feel stupid but I should just be happy I did what I  was supposed to do. Nothing else should matter. Am I ever going to do something and not feel like an idiot? If I just do it right away I'll get to sleep. I always think next time I'll do it right away. Why does there have to be a next time or any time? I tried as much as I could. I hope somehow someway that helped although I don't have any faith. I want to because I feel like I should. I feel like Alma 32 when they didn't have testimonies and were advised that if they had the desire to believe that they should let this seed be planted and after nourishing and caring for it, it would grow into something substantial.

2 Nephi 3
21 Because of their faith their ^awords shall proceed forth out of my mouth unto their brethren who are the fruit of thy loins; and the weakness of their words will I make strong in their faith, unto the remembering of my covenant which I made unto thy fathers.

24 And there shall rise up ^aone mighty among them, who shall do much good, both in word and in deed, being an instrument in the hands of God, with exceeding faith, to work mighty wonders, and do that thing which is great in the sight of God, unto the bringing to pass much ^brestoration unto the house of Israel, and unto the seed of thy brethren.

Of course I read about faith. I want to be mighty and do much good by being an instrument to God in helping to bring his children back to the House of Israel. I am grateful for my calling and the opportunities afforded to me because of that.

Called of Him to Declare His Word - Randy D. Funk

The Lord’s promises are clear. In order to have the spiritual power necessary to open the door of the kingdom of God in the nation to which you are sent, you must be humble and obedient and have the ability to hear and follow the Spirit.

These three attributes are closely interrelated. If you are humble, you will want to be obedient. If you are obedient, you will feel the Spirit. The Spirit is essential, for, as President Ezra Taft Benson taught, “Without the Spirit, you will never succeed regardless of your talent and ability.”⁷

This promise in the Doctrine and Covenants is powerful: “Let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God.”¹² As you live a virtuous life, you will feel a peaceful confidence in your standing before God and you will have the power of the Spirit to be with you.¹³

I'm so excited to be a ward missionary. I don't feel like it'll really begin until I take my Real Estate Exam on the 30th and The new year starts. I need to begin making arrangements for a substitute on the 28th because I need to take my test in Draper on the 30th. I didn't want to go anywhere but I'll be spending Christmas with my mother and George and his family. I think Sis. Smoot is trying to get that day off too.  I forgot the substitute list at home.

I hate it when I don't get enough sleep. I am tired and the day just started.