Urban Poly Princess

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

The Savior Wants us to Forgive - Craig A. Cardon

While this truth is readily accepted by all believers, not so easily acknowledged is the essential companion truth: the Savior forgives sins “upon earth” and not just at the Final Judgment. He does not excuse us inour sins.¹¹ He does not condone our return to past sins.¹² But when we repent and obey His gospel, He forgives us.¹³

My friend here at work used to buy our old books. My boss said we couldn't sell them to him so we stopped. He volunteered to, "take them to DI for us," BUT I'm pretty sure he was going to sell them. I told my boss about it and she was alright with that. He just did it again and I told her again. She said not to do it again.I told her I thought it was alright since we did it last time. She told me it was never alright. We should always get better. I like that she changed her mind. She's right.

Tuesday with a Monday vibe

0 comments Posted by 2DI4 at 4:18 PM

The day after a long weekend sort of SUCKS but then I only work 2 more days this week.I am hungry right now and I have a bunch of cookies AND homemade pizza in the fridge at home. What to do!!! What I did was eat a small bag of Cheetos out of the vending machine. I need to run to the bank and get a cashier's check to pay my rent. I don't like writing regular checks for this. I want it GONE from my account. I'm just going to eat the food I have at home for dinner tonight. I am VERY happy we don't have our real estate class until tomorrow.

Paid my rent, put some gas in my car and did a Mickey D's run

Ether 9

4 And it came to pass that Jared was anointed king over the people, by the hand of wickedness; and he gave unto Akish his daughter to wife.

5 And it came to pass that Akish ^asought the life of his father-in-law; and he applied unto those whom he had sworn by the ^boath of the ancients, and they obtained the head of his father-in-law, as he sat upon his throne, giving audience to his people.

35 And it came to pass that when they had ^ahumbled themselves sufficiently before the Lord he did send rain upon the face of the earth; and the people began to revive again, and there began to be fruit in the north countries, and in all the countries round about. And the Lord did show forth his power unto them in preserving them from famine.

Murder and power struggles. Of course Akish will want to kill his father-in-law who had him kill his father in order to marry his daughter. Family ties are absent and power is viciously traded and retained for a season before being yanked away by someone else just as power-hungry and corrupt. Intermittent moments of peace are experienced here and there and prophets call for repentance. Nothing seems to last. The only thing persistent in these chapters is constant change and flitting from wickedness to righteousness instantly.

Monday, September 2, 2013

Faith

0 comments Posted by 2DI4 at 8:43 PM

I'm finding quotes from one of my favorite talks EVER. Pres. Holland is an incredible speaker.
While this talk is about obedience, it is how faith is active in my life. We exercise our faith by being obedient to his direction in our lives. I needed to read this talk again now. I looove it. It is my go-to talk whenever I am having difficulty doing what I know I'm supposed to do. I know nothing else matters. I know all will be well if I do my part. I just feel like I'm doing that and how looong do I have to stay in the damn dark anyway.

Jeffrey R. Holland The Will of the Father in All Things
Frankly, I am a bit haunted by the thought that this is the first and most important thing he may want to know about us when ‘we meet him one day in similar fashion. Did we obey, even if it was painful? Did we submit, even if the cup was bitter indeed? Did we yield to a vision higher and holier than our own, even when we may have seen no vision in it at all?
It will be required of each of us to kneel when we may not want to kneel, to bow when we may not want to bow, to confess when we may not want to confess—perhaps a confession born of painful experience that God’s thoughts are not our thoughts, neither are his ways our ways, saith the Lord (see Isaiah 55:8).

But education, or public service, or social responsibility, or professional accomplishment of any kind is in vain if we cannot, in those crucial moments of pivotal personal history, submit ourselves to God even when all our hopes and fears may tempt us otherwise. We must be willing to place all that we have—not just our possessions (they may be the easiest things of all to give up), but also our ambition and pride and stubbornness and vanity—we must place it all on the altar’ of God, kneel there in silent submission, and willingly walk away.
“1 was constrained by the Spirit that I should kill Laban; but . . . I shrunk and would that I might not slay him” (1 Nephi 4:10). A bitter test? A desire to shrink? Sound familiar? We don’t know why those plates could not have been obtained some other way—perhaps accidentally left at the plate polishers one night or maybe falling out the back of Laban’s chariot on a Sabbath afternoon.
I believe that story was placed in the very opening verses of a 531-page book and then told in painfully specific detail in order to focus every reader of that record on the abs
olutely fundamental gospel issue of obedience and submission to the communicated will of the Lord. If Nephi cannot yield to this terribly painful command, if he cannot bring himself to obey, then it is entirely probable that he can never succeed or survive in the tasks that lie just ahead.
“1 will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded” (1 Nephi 3:7). I confess that I wince a little when I hear that promise quoted so casually among us. Jesus knew what that kind of commitment would entail, and so now does Nephi. And so will a host of others before it is over. That vow took Christ to the cross on Calvary, and it remains at the heart of every Christian covenant. “I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded.” Well, we shall see.
The work of devils and of darkness is never more certain to be defeated than when men and women, not finding it easy or pleasant but still determined to do the Father’s will, look out upon their lives from which it may seem every trace of God has vanished, and asking why they have been so forsaken, still bow their heads and obey. [Paraphrased from C. S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters (New York: Macmillan Publishing Co., 1961), p. 39]

I need to prepare for Justin not me although it is good for me to review this.

Faith Talk

0 comments Posted by 2DI4 at 6:05 PM

So I get to give a talk on faith this Saturday at Justin's baptism. I am honored to do that. I'm also grateful to be asked. I think he's asking Matt Downs too. I think Heavenly Father is giving me that talk because I don't have the faith I need to have. I just feel like I'm walking in the dark and that I've been there too long. I want to move on because nothing's happening but maybe that's NOT having faith. I'm not happy and doesn't my father in heaven want me to be happy? Isn't following the spirit supposed to bring lasting joy and happiness? I have the faith to do whatever I know I'm supposed to do no matter how much of an idiot it makes me feel like and I have faith that the joy will ultimately come.

I love this gospel so much. Heavenly father loves us so much. I don't doubt that if I do what I know to be true, if I constantly do my best it will be for the best whether I see the results immediately or not. ALSO other people don't matter. We don't need to rely on other people to make the choices that our best for us. Other people cannot hold our salvation hostage. We are the only ones who can do that.

Labor Day

0 comments Posted by 2DI4 at 1:31 PM

Everything's clean in my apartment. I have a load of dishes to do but nothing out of the ordinary, just part of daily living. My friend didn't come to church yesterday so I looked up his LinkedIn profile for any clues this morning. I definitely didn't want him to stay working in Salt Lake City or drop out of school. He hasn't so I'm wondering why I haven't seen him yet but again it's a holiday today so he could've decided to use today to move OR maybe he left our ward.

I just know I miss him BUT I don't like feeling that because he doesn't care about me. I don't really believe that BUT he could be completely in love with me BUT if he doesn't do anything it doesn't matter and he might as well not. I'm REALLY glad he's still in school.

It is raining a bunch. Not cool for all the BBQ people today. If I was in Salt Lake I'd be at Noe's BBQ I'm sure she's having OR George's house in Provo that doesn't seem that far from Salt Lake anymore now that I live in Logan. It's raining in September which makes me think yes, summer is really over. I'm watching HGTV now. I can't wait to get my couch. It should be here NOW!!! Alright payday is Wednesday and that is my 2-week mark so I have a couple days before I get excited about it and wonder where it is.

I've visited EVERY elementary school/JR high school and high school when I created the CVLA. I'm so happy with its success. It is exactly what I wanted it to be. When I start working in Real Estate I'm going to get to know this area very well. I'm alright with that BUT I still don't love this place and I am fine to move asap. Payday is Friday the 5th. I'm paying my rent tomorrow. I have to register for my real estate class on the 5th. I also need to pay my bills. I really want my real estate thing to go well to allow me to pay off a lot of my bills AND buy my mercedes SUV before I move from Logan.

Kahuku flew up here to play East High School. East killed my team but the Kahuku fans and support were incredible. I'm glad I graduated from there. I've never felt like I really belonged anywhere really. I am glad I'm a red raider for life RR4L BUUUT I didn't need to or really want to see the game. Also PCC is having their 50th reunion now. I loved working there. It doesn't hold the same place in my heart it does for my mom though. She was in the very first show at PCC. She maintains her friendships she made there too. She really wanted to be there and I wish I could've taken her there but I don't really need to be there myself.

I've had a lot of close friends but I don't need any more now. I just want my husband and then I'm good. The friends I already have are good for me.

Ether 8

8 Now the daughter of Jared being exceedingly expert, and seeing the sorrows of her father, thought to devise a plan whereby she could redeem the kingdom unto her father.

9 Now the daughter of Jared was exceedingly fair.

10 And now, therefore, let my father send for Akish, the son of Kimnor; and behold, I am fair, and I will dance before him, and I will please him, that he will desire me to wife; wherefore if he shall desire of thee that ye shall give unto him me to wife, then shall ye say: I will give her if ye will bring unto me the ^ahead of my father, the king.

The daughter of Jared is described as being exceedingly expert and exceedingly fair. She also knows she is pretty when she devises her plan and shares it with her father telling him if she dances in front of his friend he will want to marry her. She is aware of the power she has. She is able to convince her dad to ask his friend to kill his father, her grandfather. I remember reading this before. I hate these chapters of Ether because it discusses so much strife among a family. They should love each other and support their family even if they might disagree with them. It bothers me that these are not just different groups of people fighting, these are family members.

I went to Walmart to get saline solution for my contacts and lime carbonated water. I love that stuff. I checked the voicemail on my phone. It was my new home-teacher Richard Chang. He is the attractive guy with kids. Jeff is still my home teacher. Josh is in a new ward now because the family ward he lives in gave him a calling as ward clerk.

Richard is from Manoa Valley. Of course he is. He is part Chinese and attractive, he must be originally from Hawaii. He's also the one with kids, very NOT attractive. I guess I'll get to know him this way at least. I was hoping my message was my couch. I am just excited to have it here at my home.

I am so excited conference is just a month away. I'm ready for new talks. Right on time!!!

Being Accepted of the Lord - Elder Erich W. Kopischke

The feeling of being accepted by someone we love is a basic human need.

1.
Know that our hearts are honest and broken,
2.
Know that our spirits are contrite, and
3.
Be willing to observe our covenants by sacrifice, as commanded by the Lord.

Labor day morning OR late night Sunday

0 comments Posted by 2DI4 at 12:29 AM

Justin came to church today. Someone taught him how to work a tie and he looked fantastic. Krista and I went to gospel doctrine but she sat down by Jared and that is NOT happening. I've sat near him too many times recently so I told her we had to leave AFTER she sat down. We went to Gospel Principles next door instead. Justin was there with Trevor who did a great job today although I didn't see his girlfriend there so I hope he plans to keep that up whether she is there or not.

I'm so excited for he and his baptism this Saturday. I want everything to be perfect. I wish one of my nonmember friends would agree to hear the discussions and get baptized. The sisters found Justin visiting his less active aunt. They asked if they knew anyone who wanted to hear the discussions and he said he did. He lives with his aunt and uncle.

Sister Sonasi asked me if I wanted to go to general conference. I told her sure if she was providing the tickets. That fine guy I went out of my way to meet who I found out immediately has children last week is Richard Chang. That is why he is good looking. There is something extra in there. My Asian affliction. I think it's because they look like they're part Polynesian.They have that mixed look going on which is why I am attracted to them.

Justin doesn't have that look but he is still beautiful.

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Fast Sunday

0 comments Posted by 2DI4 at 11:44 AM

I didn't start my fast last night like I should've. Instead I began it this morning. NOT a full 24-hour fast like I should. My cookies taste great although I only had 2 cups of oatmeal left so I made half a recipe. I read from Les Brown's book right when I got up. I admire his tenacity. I agree with him that tenacity will propel you further than anything else. Talent and genius is fabulous but real growth comes from unrelenting pursuit of your dreams.

My dreams are constant improvement in directed areas of my life. I want excellence in my spiritual life first including having a family or be working towards that now like actively dating someone. I am grateful I finally got permission to date Justin if I want. I just want him to embrace the gospel for himself. I do feel he's doing that and while I try to fellowship him I want this to come from multiple sources, not just from me. Although he's white he's from Southern California which means he's been exposed to multiple cultures and races. Much more than than any other state in my opinion.

He's worked in Hawaii and he knows about a lot of local food, customs and culture. More importantly he has that spiritual glow that surrounds him. He is kind and a gentleman. He offered to take my trash out when I had his discussion at my apartment. He said it wasn't something a lady should do. I REALLY like that and he's not even Poly. I do take out my own trash, but it is nice to know he likes doing stuff like that. No one had to tell him to do that, he offered to help on his own. Poly boys are raised to do that naturally. They get offended if any girl tries to do that when he's around.

Sometimes I feel bad because my culture and the way I was raised has made it so I expect that to happen. It always surprises me when it doesn't and I try not to expect that from all men BUT I can't help it sometimes.

Ether 7

4 And when Corihor was thirty and two years old he rebelled against his father, and went over and dwelt in the land of Nehor; and he begat sons and daughters, and they became exceedingly fair; wherefore Corihor drew away many people after him.

26 And because the people did repent of their iniquities and idolatries the Lord did spare them, and they began to prosper again in the land. And it came to pass that Shule ^abegat sons and daughters in his old age.

27 And there were no more wars in the days of Shule; and he remembered the great things that the Lord had done for his fathers in bringing them ^aacross the great deep into the promised land; wherefore he did execute judgment in righteousness all his days.

It is amazing what people will do for a pretty face. Corihor draws away many people just because his posterity is extremely attractive. I'm not immune to this either and I know when I look good people do a lot of things for me just because of that. If Justin wasn't attractive I wouldn't be interested in getting to know him better at all and I wouldn't have discovered what I have about him. But the reason why I like people who are good-looking goes beyond just that. They usually have confidence. I don't like men who like me primarily because they like the way I look. Men that will do anything for me just based on this irritate me completely. If someone doesn't care about my other qualities, which are stellar, it ticks me off.

I don't mind if it is what motivates someone to get to know me better BUT if they like me too much without getting to know me at all it is very annoying. I want to get to know Justin right now. I like what I do know about him but I don't have any feelings for him. That only comes with time. There is no substitute for that. I am excited for him to join the church. I don't want him to feel however that because I have fellowshipped him that he needs to pay me special attention.

I am happy to just be his friend. If something more can come from that I like it, but I want him to know he has choices and if and when he is directed or is just interested in getting to know someone else that is fine with me too. Right now he is goodness personified and I know he will be blessed. Heavenly Father has been in his life for a long time and the timing of when he decided to take the discussions is no accident. I am grateful to have been able to sit in on a couple of these and to be his friend.

Your Sacred Duty to Minister - David L. Beck

I've read these talks so many times that it only takes a few words from the beginning for me to recognize them. This is the Chy story and the football boys who make her feel so loved. I think about Jen when I hear this story BUT I think there is a significant difference. Jen is not ostracized the way Chy was. I don't like clingy people in general whether they are men or women. I think it's easier for me to just avoid them completely so I'm not rude to them. I should be able to deal with them without going there. I don't have to be someone's best friend to be cordial. I can quit avoiding people and just be kind. But I think it's kinder just to avoid them.

I think of how I want to improve and I am grateful that despite my many shortcoming I am still given countless opportunities to grow and become a better person, to develop my abilities so I can serve my father in heaven more. That is fun, that is joy to me. Still I trust in what I have been told. I know I can have the greatest joy through having a family and I look forward to that time with excitement!!!

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