Urban Poly Princess

Today I made it right in time for the sacrament hymn. Our choir also sang. Our song was beautiful. I still feel stupid at practice but I feel better about my ability to follow along. Krista wants to take me to dinner at Elements Tuesday. She said because she was leaving to Taiwan soon. I don't consider December soon but I suppose it is since we're almost at the end of October. I just figured out I should be buying HE or high efficiency detergent for my HE washer and dryer. Sun liquid detergent that is HE is $5 at Family Dollar that does 125 washes. That is incredible and I should definitely buy some.

The suds from regular detergent are supposed to be bad for HE washers. This girl talked about what an incredible deal the Sun detergent was then mentioned how they were HE. Thank You Google for telling me what that means. I do have an HE washer although I didn't know what HE stood for.

I wanted to see someone, ANYONE!!! attractive to me at church. NADA!!! I feel like a Mormon Nun. I want to get married asap but I haven't meet anyone I'm even remotely attracted to right now. I want to have faith but it is REALLY hard ESPECIALLY being led away from Rich so specifically. Attractive AND I enjoy his company AND he's intelligent AND he does what I wanted to do AND he reads and Atlas Shrugged at that AND he's 1/2 Chinese raised initially in Hawaii. The alternatives ALL look horrible to me. NOOO I don't like his divorce, X-wife OR 4 kids BUT I know I'd have fun with him and he is fine. I never got the feeling he was in to me as any more than a friend BUT at least I wanted the option to pursue that myself.

And this is me having a pity party for myself. How fortunate I really am to have the gospel in my life, to work in the temple, to work at a job I love, to be learning to be a real estate agent, to be learning more about how to coupon effectively and stock my food storage. To live in a beautiful apartment where I am left alone for the most part is amazing.

BUT the MOST important thing I should be doing now is finding my husband. It is why I should've gone to singles conference, it's why I should attend all these activities. It just feels like I force myself to attend these things hoping to just meet someone normal I could even consider having a relationship with let alone marry. It's been over 10 years since my mission ended. I've never been inactive or had to return to the church. I've always known it was true. What am I doing wrong? I shouldn't have to force myself to have a good time. I'm depressing myself. What is this going to take?

It's not like I don't pray about this over and over and over again. Most people are working on their families. I just want to be able to have my own children right now. I want to find someone I can be happy with. Some things should be effortless. I want someone like Rich without the divorce, ex-wife or 4 kids. I want someone smart enough to get how smart I am, someone spiritual enough to get how spiritual I am AND someone who can make me laugh. I want someone who treats me like a queen and makes me feel like a princess. My dad and my brother treated me well. My brother still treats me well. If any man can be half the husband and father my brother is I would be the luckiest girl in the world.

My sister-in-law and nieces and nephews should NEVER forget how lucky they are to have my brother in their lives. I don't even if I did when we were growing up. I love and miss my nieces and nephews so much. They remind me of how awesome it is to have a family and how great it'll be to FINALLY have my own children although adoption may be my only option by the time I get married. I hope and pray that it isn't. I wish I could just have my kids now and get married later. I know that's not the plan and I trust in that plan. JOY in my posterity, you need to have one first.

2 Nephi 11

I prepaid my phone bill the month before last BUUUT they sent me a text saying I owed money... sooo I paid it again BUUUT then my balance showed I had 2 payment amounts in there. This time I resolved it BUUUT I wasn't able to get my mobile coupon from Family Dollar that had All laundry detergent for 50% off or .98!!! All the ladies on my couponing Facebook site had $1 off coupons making it free for them BUUUT even if it wasn't free that is a huge stock-up price. I only had 2 Caress coupons which I looove and I did get 2 bottles for just .50 each. I also got a free Suave shampoo from Smith's I'm using in my hand soap bottle because I'm out of hand soap in one of my bathrooms. I am happy and grateful AND I do have 8 bottles of laundry detergent BUUUT I could've had a year supply AND take my mother some when I visit her. I still hope to do that with something.

I need a good paper towel deal. She uses them more than I do. I have a bunch from when they had that Sparkle deal. There are deals EVERY day. I can't believe Sunday is tomorrow already and that the coupon gathering will begin all over again. Once I have about a month's worth I can get the rows of stuff everyone else gets. I need to not just get it because it's a good deal however. I bought 3 bags of sunflower seeds which was great BUUUT I NEVER buy sunflower seeds and while I don't hate them I don't particularly like them which makes them a waste of money. I DO however want the rows of dishwashing liquid and detergent everyone gets. I did get 10 Stayfree pads for $1 each which is AMAAAZING.

Cutting my coupons was A LOT easier too I just layered the pages and cut them out Wednesday night AFTER dumpster-diving the recycle bins at the post office Tuesday. It wasn't bad because people throw their junk mail in there and most people consider that junk mail. Since these are small and there are several, I wasn't grossed out. I need to see how the Red Plums turn out since we didn't get any Sunday. I don't want to spend money to save money. Just from people in my ward, at work and in my real estate class I'm getting a bunch.

Initiatories is a HUUUGE mouthful. Especially the anointings however I can't wait to learn everything. It is such a beautiful ordinance EVERY part of it. I did 2 veils, a session and initiatories. Sis. Keisker asked me if there was a post I didn't like. I told her I don't like the posts where I just stand there pointing or smiling. I wonder if this will EVER get old. I looove working in the temple. I get why my parents did it forever. I wish my brother would do it again and shave his terrorist beard. I looove that there are temples all over the place however and that I can work at any of them.

I consider coupon shopping a food storage method to accumulate what you use cheaply. I'm very happy I discovered this.

2 Nephi 9

Last night our RS met at 9:45. Of course I tried to drive the "short" way to Erin's house and ended up wasting gas and driving in circles. YEAH NOT EFFECTIVE. Erin said she thinks PERHAPS we might we splitting our ward in a couple of weeks. I guess time will tell. She is sick of our ward and actually wants to attend her home ward. The bishop was a little strange to Roger and made it so he doesn't want anything to do with our ward. Bishop made a marriage joke with Lauresa and Matt at our bishop's fireside so now she doesn't want to attend another one.

There is one fireside I attended that I felt called to repentance but not in a bad way. It was when he and sister Johnson went on and on about expecting perfection in your prospective mate. Sister Johnson told the guys not to worry about money and if they just wanted to take some girl to Harmon's for an ice-cream cone that it was alright and the girls would understand and to just call. I told her if some guy wanted to just do that NOT to call me. REALLY you have to be 31 to be in my ward and whatever the hell you're doing if you can't afford to take me to dinner somewhere, don't bother. She told me with that attitude I'd never get married. I told her I was fine with that.

BUUUT I don't expect anyone to be perfect. ALTHOUGH I know this is a HUGE problem for me. YES, maybe I do. I would just rather be single than deal with many things. I think this ward and living in Logan has made me realize that I can and SHOULD deal with much more A lot of bishop's talk hit me hard that night and I could see application all over the place. I really did try. As much as I could.

I keep thinking I'll meet someone who is brilliant with a rock testimony who is also fun and treats me like a queen. Treats me like a queen is supposed to be the easy part. I NEVER thought I'd meet anyone who was intelligent and solid spiritually who could ALSO be an ASSHOLE. I know I can be a witch and even a Bitch at times so why was this so shocking? I miss him. Krista told me not to date anyone in our ward because we don't have any attractive men there. Sister Sonasi told me the same thing. She finishes her mission in December and she keeps wanting me to go to Tonga with her when she returns.

The Salt Lake City Midsingles wards sound great. I really can't wait to get out of here. UNTIL then however I am lucky enough to work in the temple AND work in real estate eventually. I am so blessed. I wish I was married and expecting my first child now BUUUT I do love my life otherwise even if I do live in Logan right now. Living here has been worth it. I have my MBA and I will have my Real Estate license before I move from here. If the Real Estate thing takes off I can always work in it full time from March 25, 2015 when I fulfill my obligation to Stevens-Henager College to September when I complete my temple time in the Logan temple.

Blessed, blessed, blessed!!! I don't deserve half of what my Father and Heaven keeps giving me.

2 Nephi 8
1 ^aHearken unto me, ye that follow after righteousness. Look unto the ^brock from whence ye are hewn, and to the hole of the pit from whence ye are digged.
11 Therefore, the ^aredeemed of the Lord shall ^breturn, and come with ^csinging unto Zion; and everlasting joy and holiness shall be upon their heads; and they shall obtain gladness and joy; sorrow and ^dmourning shall flee away.

Isaiah's words are beautiful. It's just like reading poetry. He uses vivid images to evoke strong feelings.

2 Nephi 7
 7 For the Lord God will help me, therefore shall I not be confounded. Therefore have I set my face like a flint, and I know that I shall not be ^aashamed.

Class was EXTREMELY hard for me last night. Simply staying awake was difficult. I was having such a tough time staying awake. I think it's because I ran to Family Dollar in Hyrum just to get my 2 6-pack of Sparkle paper towels. Everyone else on my Cents-a-ble coupon Facebook site took lots of pictures of their MAAANY rolls of paper towels. When I got home I had to clean my house or it would've driven me crazy. I stayed up until 2am cleaning. I still need to do more laundry BUUUT it is MUUUCH better. 

I found the EXACT same couch I ordered from Aaron's furniture at Kmart. Although the leather is bonded and has that snake skin seared into it, for $300, that is about $400 LESS than I would've paid through Aaron's AND I can buy it free and clear sooo that is what's happening. It is very comfortable. I can completely stretch out on it. I'm going to put it on layaway and pay for most of it but then figure out when my home teachers can help me then pay for the balance that day.  Jeff has that trailer he used when he helped me move. I don't really like the bonded leather BUUUT it is extremely comfortable and at least I like the style. What I REALLY like is the price tag!!!

Hastening the Lord's Game Plan - S. Gifford Nielsen
What would you do if the prophet of the Lord really called you? Well, he has! President Thomas S. Monson, as he did once again this morning, has called each one of us to a very important work. He said, “Now is the time for members and missionaries to come together, to work together, to labor in the Lord’s vineyard to bring souls unto Him”

I spent my lunchtime going to Family dollar to get 2 packs of 6 Sparkle paper towels. Shoppers can use a mobile coupon for 50% off. I also have a $1 Family Dollar coupon and a $1 manufacturer's coupon. This is supposed to result in each of them costing .86. That's for 6-paper towels. The Logan store was sold out of these but I had her call the Hyrum store and they are holding 2 for me.

Next I went to the bank which is CLOSED for Columbus Day. I ate some yogurt for breakfast along with some popcorn and chocolate. Lunch was 2 McDoubles and more yogurt. I'm already getting sleepy. I walked around and talked to Dale, Chris and Sharon in the IT office.

This has been sitting here.