Urban Poly Princess

The thought I had to drive to Salt Lake after work is just not going to happen. For some reason I was exhausted yesterday and I couldn't pack anything. Tomorrow I want to spend all day doing exactly that. I briefly thought of doing that for an hour during my lunchtime BUT that's sure as hell NOOOT going to happen.

I recalculated my rate and it isn't what I wanted it to be at the Lehi Library. It will come out to around 41,000 a year. HOWEVER this is the best position for me AND will help me reach my career goal of managing a library in a large system or being a director in a small one. I kept thinking the Lehi Librarian was one of SEVERAL librarians but that is NOOOT the case at all. The Librarian is in charge of EVERYTHING although I keep trying to figure out who the library director is by researching it online BUT I still have no clue.

There is actually a state job I'm interested in AND it starts at 56,160. It is a Legislative Policy Analyst. I covered the legislature when I worked as the u's political reporter. I would looove that job AND the pay AND the location is sooo close to my mother's house.With my MBA and background in writing it would be perfect. STILL the best position for my future is the Lehi Librarian job.

My interview is Monday at the Lehi library. I need to get this job AND take it. It is truly best for my future and I need to do it even if it doesn't pay what I wanted which was a full time job earning 46,000 a year at least. I know I am uniquely qualified to do this job and I can't wait to get back into public librarianship. I did apply for Delta's part time reservations agent AND I also applied for BYU's librarian faculty position. That probably does pay around 46,000 to start with regular raises. The state job IS at the capitol and there are 3 openings. I know I'd enjoy that. There are librarian positions all over the place however and I know strengthening my skills there is better for me in the long-run. Lehi is the best learning-on-the-job opportunity for me.

Moroni 4
3 O God, the Eternal Father, we ask thee in the name of thy Son, Jesus Christ, to bless and sanctify this bread to the souls of all those who partake of it; that they may eat in remembrance of the body of thy Son, and witness unto thee, O God, the Eternal Father, that they are willing to take upon them the name of thy Son, and always remember him, and keep his commandments which he hath given them, that they may always have his Spirit to be with them. Amen.

I took Keri to lunch at Mo Bettah because she helped me drop off my car and then get my car. She is a TA here. She was an excellent student and we were very fortunate to have had her attend school AND work here now.I left a message for the Binghams, my temple supervisors. Following work I'm going to pack as much as I can in my car I hope to just leave for Salt Lake City from work tomorrow. I want to watch the Salt Lake City parade from mom's AC-house tomorrow.

That was sooo good. I miss my local Hawaiian food all the time. I looove that they have a decent Hawaiian place here in Logan. Lunch today made me feel like I was in Hawaii. BUT then I stand somewhere hot and I remember EXACTLY where I am.I should be writing my cover letter and then CV for the position I applied to at BYU BUUUT I don't want to work there. I wonder if and when Lehi City plans to call me for an interview. The position seems to be a supervisory one. I would do that well. Having my own schedule is EXACTLY what I want. I would LOOOVE to be able to decorate the library the way I want it to look. I have stuff I bought here for my office. I made sure to remind them everything I bought to decorate my office I did myself.

Moroni 3
 3 In the name of Jesus Christ I ordain you to be a priest (or if he be a teacher, I ordain you to be a teacher) to preach repentance and remission of sins through Jesus Christ, by the endurance of faith on his name to the end. Amen.

I think I'm starting my period soon because I am breaking out. I have given up the thought that ONLY teenagers break out. I am sooo past that age but a zit still dares to pop up on my face. GRRR!!!

INSTEAD of going to FHE I went to Burger King and went through the ENTIRE LIST I hadn't called yet. I ordered a whopper JR meal. It took sooo freakin long. BUT now I have a sub for Saturday meaning I can drive to Salt Lake Wednesday evening and not return until August 4th. I think I'll check out my future ward. Lulu was very involved in the Mid Singles Salt Lake Scene. I wouldn't even consider someone white then. I always wanted someone Poly BUUUT now I think I do share more things in common with white men ALTHOUGH not ALL white men AND the cultural things are still tough to swallow BUT I think I never realized how important just simple communication is to me that most of my lovely Poly boys just don't have.

Curtis is intelligent, writes well, has confidence, a sense of humor, dresses well and is close to his family. I hope I get the chance to get to know him better. He is good and pure. I'm not sure why I'm not trying harder. I know I'm leaving but it's not like I'm going out-of-state UNLESS I move to Hawaii... NOOO it is even more difficult to find someone there who is just LDS let alone fine, good and ambitious.

I am so grateful I was able to find 2 women who will work for me allowing me to truly enjoy my vacation week in Salt Lake. Right now I think I should finish my cover letter, CV and then apply for a Hawaii Librarian job. Again I think I could handle a mixed local Asian boy. I always wanted someone Poly but just simple communication is severely lacking there unfortunately. I'm not sure why I didn't get that earlier. Why do I finally figure that out now.

I talked to my old Zonie Derek about Real Estate and the companies I'm interested in working. He said Park City is a difficult market to break into. City Home Collective and Urban Homes and Estates are definite gay-friendly companies. NOT that I'm gay-unfriendly BUT I'd rather just not deal with the issue at all ESPECIALLY NOT on a regular basis. The commercial real estate company is legit and Derek said he's done deals for them before. Usually he said they work on salary and close a few deals a year. He said the company does work for the church all the time.

I still need to write my CV and cover letter for BYU. Lehi city sent me a questionnaire that asked what rate I expected to be paid among other things. I asked for the maximum amount. I think I have a very good chance BUT then again I don't know what my competition is and who else applied for the job. My education, training and experience fit this job VEEERY well.

It's FHE in 5 minutes. I actually need to call people to try to work for me Saturday at the temple. I need to leave my apartment to go to where my telephone works so I can call ladies on my substitute list. I have to do it now because the sooner I do it the better chance I have of finding someone.

She is so lucky. If I didn't have my mother to worry about I'd probably move to California. Actually I think I'd really like to live in DC or New York. I think I'm worried about not getting a job when I NEED a job. It is infinitely tougher when you are done with school. I had come up with all these things I planned to do but then I end up breaking all those decisions and applying for things anyway that I am even remotely interested in. I'm not going to apply for the U's librarian positions. I am committed to real estate but I am even more committed to surviving. Derek Whetten my old zonie who is a successful realtor told me to call him tomorrow.

It's Pioneer day Thursday so I actually don't have work and need to find 2 more substitutes for the temple for the next 2 weeks. I should check out the Monument Park ward. I wonder if Drew and DJ are in that ward. Julie is probably in that ward now. I wish I was moving out-of-state. I'd like to meet entirely new people. Today they served peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in Linger Longer. I don't think so. That's NEVER happening. I remember in elementary school coming home and eating these with my brother. My mom used to make us cookies too. Everyday, yeah that wasn't a good habit to have.

I couldn't get to sleep last night. My thermostat is screwy. It seems to be controlled somewhere else and is stuck at 75 which is freakin hooot!!! The whole reason why I moved here was over the AC not working the way it should. I am leaving in a little over a month BUUUT that is still a little over a month HERE.

I didn't see Curtis during church BUUUT I went looking for Holly and found him instead in the kitchen WITH Sister Henry. I wanted to go out with him at least once before I leave but that possibility seems more and more remote. He is growing a hipster beard now I sure hope he loses. I don't mind the five o'clock shadow BUUUT I detest the hipster beard EVERYONE seems to be sporting now. Why the hell is he going to hide something as fine as his face???!!! That should be a crime.

I found Holly and I am going to have to see if Lisa and I can see her. Bishop told me I have a good voice since he heard me sing in the back of him. That was nice. It is my weakness BUUUT I am glad I stuck with this and I plan to continue it wherever I go. I figured out my new ward is the Monument 19th Ward.

I actually submitted an application with Delta airlines for their flexible reservations position you work at home. Training is in the late afternoon-early evening. I just had to do it. If I don't have a job I need to try anything attractive to me. IT TOOK FOREVER. They wanted a 10-year job history AND address history. I just want the damn flight benefits and you can only work 1300 hours a year. That is perfect because I want the flight benefits without having to work there full time. Actually I think there's a minimum of 1200 hours.

I probably want too much. I always do. I want to work full time AND get flight benefits and have that part time work from home.

In my week and a half of WALKING I took a Book with me to our RS activity because I knew I'd have to pass time there when I got there early. I decided to finish it this morning. Someone borrowed #2 and never returned it. I'm going to have to get it back because now I need to finish it. It's paranormal like just about every YA novel now. It is good and everyone who has read it has loved it including me. It reminds me of Twilight because it is very focused on relationships. It consumes the entire book. That is probably what I loved about it. She has 2 soul mates she has to choose from. It is a trilogy so I'm excited to read the rest.

I don't know how Twilight gained the cult-following it did. I don't see how original it is or amazing.
To me the Tales of Narnia and Lord of the Rings were better than Harry Potter. The Hunger games just ran with the Lottery and added in some modern elements. I don't know what makes one thing successful and something else not.

So I went to work because I STILL hadn't received my transcript from BYU-Hawaii and I wanted it to count for my Salt Lake County 30-hour Marketing/Communication Assistant position I applied for. It was FINALLY there today thanks to the time difference BUUUT the position closed today. I tried to call Human Resources to convince them to let me add it. I already uploaded my MLS and MBA transcripts so I didn't think they'd mind adding my English BA. To my dismay she had no record of me applying AT ALL although she did have a record of my profile BUUUT now it's too late and I won't even be considered. WOW!!!

Instead I submitted a BYU application because they have a librarian position which for the first time aligns with my experience. It is a librarian who concentrates on freshmen and teaching them research skills. With my BA in English and experience teaching research writing and APA style to incoming students at Stevens-Henager College it fits me perfectly. I don't want to live in Provo however or work at an academic library. BYU is the best school in the state however and it would look good on my resume. I did enjoy going to school there back in the day. It would give me faculty status and could potentially pay me more if I worked there for several years AND give me amazing benefits. GRRR!!! Who knew I'd even have a choice? It is tough to decide. I hate Provo although after living in Logan for 4 years it is a total improvement over Cache Valley.

I'm not an idiot however. The Lehi position is my first choice and I can see myself doing a lot of outreach and exploring the Lehi community. I think it is what I would enjoy... BUT... BYU has regular devotionals with apostles each week and the prophet even. I'm sure I could take some religion classes and exploit my scripture nerd tendencies. BYU-Hawaii gives the faculty an all-expense paid trip EVERY 3 years. I can't imagine BYU is different. There are probably more single worthy men in Utah Valley than in Salt Lake City. I love that my brother lives there. I love my nieces and nephews and it would be fun being close to them. I have MANY first cousins there. My dad's brother lives in Orem.

I kind of hate how many people from my hometown live there now BUT it is also a good thing. If I can't get a public librarian job this really isn't a bad option. Decisions, decisions GRRR!!! Of course I have to even get an interview for both. I still need to write and then submit a CV and cover letter. I don't even have a CV. I can write anything however, I'm not scared of that. EITHER job is a blessing. BYU would be a second choice BUUUT NOT a bad second choice.

Living in Provo to me would be hell. Almost as bad as Logan. I want to be there for my mother too. She said she was considering moving there.

I looked at the church employment site and typed in Librarian. The search pulled up 2 librarian positions at LDS Business College. I could walk to work there from my mom's house. Each position listed its posting as 6 days ago BUUUT the posting date was February and is probably the posting I saw when I tried to get out of my contract with Sharla earlier this year. I called the library and asked if they have an opening and they don't BUUUT she told me to check after Fall semester. They had a part time position that could work once I am working because LDS Business College has a working professional population that attends school at night similar to Stevens-Henager College.

I am really grateful that Jimmy allowed me to not have to worry about that. I actually think working at Lehi will prepare me to manage the new Marmalade library that should have its building finished and open next year. I would be an excellent manager there which is like being a director for the Lehi library, Logan library or any individual county library. Lehi would prepare me best to takeover the Marmalade library. I would enjoy getting to know the community better that I live in. I could sooo get used to that.

If I move to an administrative position at the Main library that would be ideal and it would be in walking distance to my loft I will be able to afford with my nice big salary and real estate side deals I make. Life is sweet!!!

4 Nephi

I'm not really sure why it happened but I am sure I like it very much. I paid my tithing first. I like putting it in the form of a cashier's check so it's taken OUT of my account before I can use it by mistake. Next I took out 500 in cash for my bill. I had 240 in cash and my bill was 725.74 so I have 14 dollars and some change in my purse now. I need to plan for my phone bill, insurance and gas for my trip to Salt Lake next week.

This was just my day to be blessed. Thank U!!! I can't believe how much I appreciate my car now. I am also so grateful to have found that Lehi public librarian opening. The receptionist for the city lady emailed to thank me. I will follow up with the county to see if they received the transcripts and application I submitted. I'm STILL waiting on the lady from BYU-Hawaii. It's almost 6 already although it's not that late there.

I ordered pizza and chicken from Dominos. I'm ALSO stopping by the donut shop on the way home because I'm hungry!!! I am going to eat crap THEN go home and clean and tomorrow I'll shop for some stuff I need.

FIRST, I found the PERFECT library position in Lehi. I've never seen their library or anything BUT it is EXACTLY what I need. Cousins Tilila and her family AND her brother Kolo and his family live there. My friend Lei also lives there with her family. There is a Tongan ward there where Richard, Tilila's husband is the bishop. Kolo and Lei are in that ward. It is 30 minutes from my mother's house and takes almost the same time to drive there as it does to drive to Herriman, Riverton or South Jordan libraries in Salt Lake County's system. I feel REALLY good about the position because it fits my qualifications PERFECTLY. Actually I'm waaay overqualified for what they list. The library is open M-Th 9-9 and Fri/Sat 9-6. PERFECTO AND I can still do the Real Estate thing!!! I can work there for a long time AND live in my loft in downtown Salt Lake City after I stay with my mom for awhile first. THE BEST part of this position is it pays $46,904 - that's the max end I hope to get with my 2 Master degrees. It's EXACTLY where it should be now!!!

My mom's health is deteriorating and I'm worried about her. She told me she can't eat chicken anymore. I told her to set up her doctor's appointment.

I have just a little over 5 years experience. It would be 8 but I didn't work full time with Salt Lake County. To make it even better I was paid!!! MEANING: I CAN PICK UP MY CAR TODAY!!! Our TA Keri said she'll give me a ride to get my money and then drop me off. I am feeling so blessed!!! ALL on one day!!!

That doesn't mean I'll stop looking or applying for positions ALTHOUGH this is truly perfect and I'd love to do it.

AFTER WALKING all this time I am sooo excited to get my car back today!!!

My assistant called in today. Her husband was rushed to Salt Lake again where they will be for the next few days. Wow! He just went through this. I hope Judy is alright. This is awful. Jimmy and the school are in the paper this morning. The Herald Journal photographer is the same guy I worked with for a few of the feature stories I wrote when I did an internship with them right after I moved here. It was a short but fun time. Editing was fun ALTHOUGH I will NEVER read another obituary again UNLESS it is someone I know and I am a close friend. Obituaries are usually written by grieving family members with varying degrees of writing abilities. Trying to judge between having a grammatically correct obituary and respecting what a  family member has written can be tricky sometimes. I haaated reading these!!! NEVER AGAIN.

Jimmy wants to reach out and see if we can assist Judy somehow. I have no clue. Tonight is our ward temple night and I'm not walking up that hill to make a session. I'm also not calling anyone to pick me up. I really hope tomorrow I can tell if I'm paid on Friday for sure. Then I need to call my visiting teachers to see if they can help me tomorrow go to the bank and then pick up my car. I need to call today to make sure everything's alright.

So I just talked to someone at the Ford dealership and he is waiting on a pulley but the truck that is supposed to deliver the part was in a messy truck accident so he won't get that until tomorrow. He told me to call tomorrow afternoon to check the status on that. Wow! Even if I could afford to pay it now they wouldn't be able to give me my car yet. My car died on July 5th. I've walked or caught rides for a full week and a half now. I am sooo over waiting for this nightmare to be over.

I am also waiting for Hawaii time so I can call BYU-Hawaii and figure out how to get an unofficial copy of my transcripts. Noon our time will be 8am Hawaii time which is when I expect their office to be open. GRRR!!! The registrar's office doesn't open until 8:30am. 23 more minutes...

I want that library communication job and I need to have my BYU-Hawaii English Degree to count and it doesn't unless I send them my unofficial transcript.

Since options are imperative I went ahead and applied for the 30-hour marketing position at the county library. Tomorrow I'll submit my transcripts from BYU-Hawaii, Emporia and Stevens-Henager. I love that all my schools are from different states. I strengthened my resume first before submitting it. My plan is to learn and excel at the job first and then ultimately to change the nature of the position and have it be more responsible, administrative and of course PAY MORE!!! I will first try to negotiate for this.

Actually eventually I'd love Scott Russell's job of Community Relations PR Marketing Director. It is the only administrative position I'm interested in holding. This is a stepping-stone to that which is another good reason for me to take it. I still plan on doing my real estate thing BUUUT I just wanted to do this too. I hope after I turn in my transcripts it'll be time for an interview. It is time for me to call the sub lady Linda Broussard.

I just spoke with Linda and she said they are not hiring now. It may be a good thing I applied for this job. I've interacted a little with the director of the entire system Jim Cooper AND Gretchen the system Tech Director. Another reason why I want this job is it is system-wide. I printed off the County's compensation plan and the max is 46,000 a year for this position which is just grade 20. That is 22.50 an hour and comes out to a yearly of 35,100 which is fine for only working 30 hours a week. That position also has benefits which I would enjoy very much.With my degrees I am hoping I not only get interview but that I also can get the maximum amount of the grade AND get hired and eventually, as in QUICKLY, be so efficient and convince them to let me work just 3 days leaving plenty of time to do real estate.

I asked for the librarian salary start rate. STILL without a raise all these years it hasn't been good. If I had been hired by the county when I started working here I would've been making 44,106.40 by now. YES I am ticked. Of course I had to get the job. They ALWAYS need subs so I am thinking they are full of crap about subbing and I just may qualify for unemployment anyway. I don't really want to apply for 4 jobs a week but whatever I need to do.

OK, there's this link that lets you estimate through using your SS# how much you'll receive in unemployment. I qualify for $312 a week which is like subbing 22 hours a week which I could do if I needed to do that. I am assuming they are going to hire me again. Why the hell wouldn't they. I worked as a sub for 3 and a half years.

I read stuff about Utah unemployment online which you can only receive if 30% of your benefit is not exceeded through a job part time or otherwise. That would mean not subbing more than 4 hours a week. What I love about libraries is most are open until 9 or 9:30pm. I could work 8 hours a day EVERY day in real estate and STILL work an extra 4 subbing at night. There were always more work than substitutes when I did that.

When you collect unemployment you need to submit the names of 4 companies you applied for each week. How the hell does someone not get a job doing this all the time? Subbing will give me the same cushion until I get the full time job I really want AND it lets me rock real estate at the same time. It is flexible enough for me to work with a mentor on their crazy schedule.

Although my income will drop significantly I won't be paying rent which will be very nice. I am very lucky. There's this Tongan lady who told me she wanted to sell her house and then get something smaller. I wonder if there's any way I can make a deal with Kyle so he can do it for her legally. I can do all the work and it would be nice if I could land some commission too before I leave this valley. I can't get paid without a broker so the only way I could do that is if I worked with Kyle and he decided to pay me.

I just read the Marketing position description again and I would looove to do it. The pay is a concern BUUUT I would REALLY enjoy it. It also has benefits which are fabulous. Subbing does not provide benefits, AND it pays $2 less an hour. I'm going to go for it and see. I want them to wait for me until September 1st. I definitely want to get paid COMPLETELY for these 2 months of not doing a whole hell of a lot but I need that money especially with my car from hell AND that bill I have to pay soon.OF COURSE there is no guarantee I will get the job BUT I have to try this.

I love my life. I am grateful for EVERYTHING. I need to call the Dealer to see how they are progressing with my car. So the part for my car just arrived today and she said it should be complete this afternoon. I wish I had the money NOW to pay her. I have $300 left along with the dollars in my purse. The 20th lands on Sunday which typically means we are paid on the Monday BUUUT with my credit union it could be there Friday which would be sooo nice.

I'm so grateful I don't have to pay the end of lease fee beforehand. There is a nice 30-hour marketing position with the library. After I have proven myself I'd love to negotiate 3 days a week so I can do my Real Estate too. That would pay for my ULA membership as well as PLA membership. I looove the county library system and I can see myself working there for a long time. The position is sucky because it starts at 16 an hour although since it is the county I know there are regular raises and I would love to work at a position that allows me to work with all the libraries. I REALLY like the 30 hours and I think I could negotiate so I could get it to 3 days a week so I could still pursue Real Estate. There are librarian positions that do that too and I could negotiate on a librarian salary which I could get a hell of a lot higher than this marketing position. I could live in South Jordan eventually if I wanted. It is a 30-hour position and I want to negotiate to work there just 3 times a week and NOT work Fridays AGAIN.

Yeah about living in South Jordan... NOOO!!! UNLESS I'm raising a family AND living in a nice HOUSE there it isn't happening. I'd rather live now in a loft downtown. If I was going to live in the middle of nowhere it would ONLY be while raising a family. I'm pretty certain of that and JUST by looking at pictures.

GRRR... I'm not sure if I should apply but I want to give it a shot. Getting a job right away is certainly a good thing. If I get rejected however I will be ticked and I am worried about applying for this job that pays crappy. Will it affect my ability to negotiate for another librarian job with the county if I do this? What exactly will this be like? Should I do it or not? It closes Friday meaning they probably want me to begin in August. Would they wait for me for September? Subbing is flexible but it pays horribly. 14 an hour vs. 16 an hour BOTH crappy rates. I didn't want to do anything that pays less than 20 right now. DAMN decisions. I keep praying about it but I don't feel anything either way. Is that the stupor of thought that actually means no?

I think this will interfere in my Real Estate thing. I need to give it a shot instead of finding ways to avoid it. How do I sit here and NOT apply for things when at the end of August I won't have a job. Unemployment, I am getting it. But for how long? I need to figure that out. At a minimum I need to pay for insurance, gas and some of the weird food I have to eat now. I really want a fulltime public librarian job and none of them seem to be available now which is why it is perfect for me NOT to do anything else except librarian subbing. Librarian marketing sounds like fun however but how will that affect my ability to get anything else? If I rock that job will I be able to change the nature of the position, be as flexible as I'd like to be BUUUT will I never be able to realize my full real estate potential then? I think so and I am going to stick with subbing and holding out for a job that pays me what I'm worth. With my experience AND MBA I should qualify for an assistant manager position that'll train me to be a manager and make over 75,000 in a few years. That is what I need to aim for.

A lucrative real estate career, eventually a library manager who still does real estate on the side and then begins to flip houses, pays off my school loans and then buys my condo loft in downtown Salt Lake City, my condo at Turtle Bay Hilton in Hawaii and then also $ to burn and have fun with traveling all over the place.This is harder than I thought it would be.

My poor boss was experiencing excruciating pain today. I had to get letterhead downstairs and he was in so much pain he was actually laying down on his back in Afu's office. I hope he goes through this as fast as possible. I can't even imagine how that would be. Once I found the letterhead I was looking for I walked upstairs and they had transferred Jimmy to a wheelchair. He stayed in this until his wife came to pick him up. I hope he feels better soon.

I walked to bishop's house for our fhe BBQ. Bishop told us there's a reason why we ended up in a smaller ward although he doesn't know what that is exactly. He told us their crazy marriage story as did Bro. Kitchens.

I went downstairs and started to unpack some books that arrived but Eli stopped me saying he had to do it sooo... basically I'm getting paid to sit around doing NOTHING. I want to scream BUUUT I need to keep it together and keep this in perspective. I know Jimmy did this, gave me all this time so that I could look for another job AND pack everything, basically be completely prepared for my departure. People will need to do what I've done when I'm not here. This is a wonderful opportunity and one I should use as well as I can.

I'm going to order boxes from that organization that ultimately gives you free shipping. I can physically clean everything out of here that we don't need anymore. I can clean all the dust AND then clean our portion in the storage room. I can delete all the files on this computer I don't want to be here.I can sharpen my resume and apply for any job I want. It is so hard NOOOT to try to get just any job. Delta Airlines just hired reservation agents who after a 15-week training can work from their PC at home. These are part time positions I'd love because once the schedule begins I can rock the real estate thing WHILE racking up flight benefits. I just can't imagine working for an airlines because the crappy pay.

It WOULD allow me to travel all over the place which is what I'd love BUUUT I think the crappiest work I'm actually willing to do is a librarian substitute with the county again. That only pays 14 an hour which is awful BUUUT it is also flexible, low-stress AND allows me to keep my librarian skills current. Ideally I want a part time librarian manager job but I don't think any of the managers are part time.

Naise worked 20 hours for the County on the weekends. That will be fine as my realtor skills are developed more.

It is hard keeping in my head that I should pursue real estate when it doesn't pay immediately. It does pay well however and I need to keep that foremost in my head. It is difficult because I'm going to need money. It's time for me to make my soup. I'm trying to think of something to take to my bishop's house tonight for our FHE BBQ/Potluck. They want us to take dessert or a salad. I can roast my cauliflower.

Let Your Faith Show - Russell M. Nelson
Whether truth emerges from a scientific laboratory or through revelation, all truth emanates from God. All truth is part of the gospel of Jesus Christ.⁴ Yet I was being asked to hide my faith. I did not comply with my colleague’s request. I let my faith show!
Spiritual truth cannot be ignored—especially divine commandments. Keeping divine commandments brings blessings, every time! Breaking divine commandments brings a loss of blessings, every time!⁵

My friend posted on Facebook that her favorite talk is Of Souls, Symbols and Sacraments by Jeffrey R. Holland. She is awesome so I had to look it up and read it myself. It is a beautiful talk on intimacy and why it is so sacred and important, why violating chastity is so severe and next to murder in intensity.

I enjoyed this talk but the conclusions it draws are not new to me. I have thought a lot about this. I don't doubt it has EVERYTHING to do with why I was led repeatedly to annoying. There is no other explanation for that. Unfortunately I also think it is why I was so specifically warned against Rich because he trivializes intimacy.

It is the best characteristic Curtis has although I don't know him well enough to know for sure if he really is as pure as he feels. He has the image of the Savior in his countenance. I feel he is clean whenever I'm in his presence.

I found another mindless addiction: Million Dollar Listing New York. It is such a great show for getting me in the real estate mode. Ryan one of the agents is very hot. I like to watch he and the other 2 agents. They are super-concerned with how they look so they eat right for the most part and work-out too. The busiest agent is gay and just married his husband. He is hot too but he looks like Will Farrell which is weird at the same time because the resemblance is huuuge. His name is Frederick.

His assistant tried to help him cut down his spending when he told him he spends $50 on sushi every day for lunch. Yeah I could certainly do lunch with him. He just needs a good quality all-you-can-eat sushi place then he'd spend around $25.

I need to make a conscious effort not to just interact with my family when I move back to Salt Lake City. That is the one thing Logan has forced me to do, get to know people who are NOT related to me and interact with them. How else am I going to be a Real Estate Mogul. ALSO how else am I going to find and marry my husband. It is only through talking to other people and getting to know them better that this can happen.

I hope Curtis lets me hang out with him and get to know him better. I think we can work together professionally some day although I'm still not exactly sure what he does. AGAIN I hope he lets me find out. I woke up super-early so I could zumba then shower and walk to work. I ate some miso soup with spinach I threw in and meatballs. I have more meatballs and spinach I plan to eat later with cream of broccoli soup I have sitting in my drawer. There are some peanuts in the vending machine I can eat for .75.

I'm eating better because it gives me energy throughout the day. I'm sick of feeling tired. I also don't like how I look in Krista's wedding pictures. I look very fatty. I need to get rid of the jiggle if I plan to rock real estate which is exactly what I plan to do.

There is a bishop's fireside tonight but I asked Sis. Henrie where Curtis was today and she told me he is in Idaho on vacation. I REALLY didn't want to have to look for a ride there and then not see him so I'm glad I asked her. When I went to Sunday school earlier I saw Jessica dressed badly today and it made me think maybe he hadn't come to church because she is like a lot of people who I don't get at all. I like dressing up because I like looking good WHOEVER I see and/or run into. When I saw how she looked today and since I figured out she likes him it made me wonder if he'd show up or not. Thanks to her it didn't surprise me he didn't come to church today. I had to find out for sure however which is why I asked Sis. Henrie.

Susie told me first that it was my fault that he had to go out of town. She was just teasing me however. I hope he's alright with hanging out with me even if I am leaving. It seems like it would be a waste of time when I think about it like that but I'm going to try because he does have the light of Christ in his eyes. His field is another reason why I should get to know

Susie and Bonnie said he knows he's good-looking. I'm not sure what they are basing that on. If it is why he knows how to treat Jessica and has the confidence he should have that is just fine with me. He is beautiful and he should know that. It doesn't make him a bad person. Bonnie said he's very stylish. Yes he is that. I hope he has a nice vacation wherever he is. Sis. Henrie told me exactly where he went but I wasn't familiar with it.

I wish it was the 20th already and I didn't have to spend any more time walking. Walking is fine, the heat is what sucks. I wonder if Curtis went on vacation with his family. I hope he takes pictures whoever he went with. I'd like to see something new on his page. Walking the Riverwalk in this heat??? Not a freaking chance!!!

First I returned the keys the office lent me. I also talked to Trevor about what he was going to charge me since I'm leaving on September 4th and won't pay the cancelation fee. He said they'll just take it from my deposit. He was very nice. I'm scared and excited at the same time. Lori told me I was choosing to do this when I told her I'm not going to work just any job and that I need a public librarian job that pays enough or I'll do real estate but nothing else. I really do think it is important to do what I love and it is important to my own future to make a decision like this.

This is actually going to help me work harder to make my dreams reality. There is nothing wrong with that extra push. It is what I need. I got an invitation from my friend Melissa who moved to Virginia with Dillards. She looks super hot in her invitation. I'm so excited for her. I went to work and picked up my keys before walking to Wendy's where I bought a couple of bacon double cheeseburgers and a small french fry. Next I went to Walmart where I picked up ground beef, a dollar frozen lunch, cheetos and granola gars. I walked back and now I'm here stuffed and sleepy. I'm going to take a nap next.

Unfortunately that doesn't mean I get to sit around all day. Instead I have to get my keys from work. If I can walk to get my nails done I can certainly walk to Walmart. I need garlic and maybe some broccoli. I have ANOTHER week of walking before my car is ready so I need to suck it up and go, first to get my keys then to Walmart. THEN I can come back and camp in my AC.

There are 18 libraries in the county system and 7 in the city AND there are NOOO openings at either. Maybe this is meant to force me to start my real estate career. I know my father-in-heaven helped with my real estate thing. Lauren Hill just did the Twilight concert in Salt Lake last night. That means a FREE concert right downtown. GRRR!!! I'm trying to think if Walmart has an ATM. Most Walmarts do but I've never seen one there. I'll just replace some of the cash I have. I need to go to the bank when I pick up my car so I'm going to get someone to help me get cash and then drop me off at the dealer when my car is ready anyway. BUUUT not for another week at least.

Alma 45

Since we were having our BBQ at my apartment complex I ate then asked some Korean neighbors who were walking in the direction of the pool to let me in. Once I was inside I asked the office people to let me into my apartment since I left the keys at work. I can't believe I did this. Tomorrow I'm going to WALK there and get them. The office guy Trevor was very nice to let me in.

As I look at various jobs it is more difficult now that I've completed school. I know exactly what I want to do and exactly how much money I should be making. I'm just not willing to do something I "sort of" like. I have to be passionate about it. There are 2 librarian positions at the University of Utah BUUUT although they pay alright, I want to work in public libraries and I need to do everything in my power to bring that about. I've enjoyed working at Stevens-Henager College but I am passionate about public libraries. I'm not going to work at another academic library. There is something very attractive to me that wants to interact with and develop my community.

I love real estate too and I am more than willing to learn what I have to learn to be very successful in that profession. Krista posted some of her wedding photos. I haaate what I wore there. It is such a fatty outfit and standing by the beanpole Asians didn't do me any favors. I MUST lose weight and fit again. A lot of sales is how you look. I have to look my best ALL the time.

I'm excited and scared about rocking real estate and also finding another public librarian job in Salt Lake City. They have 2 library systems in Salt Lake City. I just want a lucrative job at one of them.

That means plastic leis, water guns, music and hotdogs on the grill. I'm glad I don't have to pay for my own food today. Time for me to go down there and eat stuff!!! 3 hotdogs, cheetos and I came upstairs for water. I hate soda. THE ONLY thing I feel like I need to do ALL the time. Today I need to get my nails done. My lovely lunchtime activity.I purposely left any cash I have at home so I'm not tempted to spend it. I can't believe I'm going to walk somewhere to get my nails done. I've taken trax to Crossroads Mall when it still existed to get my nails done. Nothing recently. I can't wait until I get my car. That'll be much too long.

I like mayonnaise on my hotdogs. Apparently I am one of  the few because no one else seemed bothered by that or rather the lack of it. There was some sort of creamy hot mustard sauce that helped a little. My apartment complex is having a BBQ party tonight too by the pool. They did that last year as well. I guess it's BBQ season. My ward FHE is having one Monday night at bishop's house. He actually lives pretty close to me. I think I'll walk there too.

Alma 44
15 Now there were many, when they heard these words and saw the scalp which was upon the sword, that were struck with fear; and many came forth and threw down their weapons of war at the feet of Moroni, and entered into a covenant of peace. And as many as entered into a covenant they suffered to depart into the wilderness.

Irony -- The covenant of peace is entered into through violent means.