Urban Poly Princess

I went to a birthday party in Tremonton about a half hour drive from Logan. I made my friend give me a tour when I was there and hang out with me. I had fun. It made me think a lot.

His lifestyle and life choices R completely different but his parents had different life choices too. His father drinks with him and his sister parties with him BUT they are all great and kind people. He has a testimony of the gospel but there's a lot he doesn't understand and he doesn't c the need to understand that really. He's been a great friend to me and I am grateful for the chance I've had to have a friend who doesn't share my values but can still respect my decisions.

I know exactly what I want and I never thought it was wrong-I still don't for the most part. I guess what I've learned is NOT to undermine the atonement. Murder and denying the Holy Ghost R the only things the atonement doesn't cover so it REALLY doesn't matter what someone's done in the past if they do decide to change.

I know our decisions in the pre-existence determined how we arrived in this world and what type of families we end up with. It just made me think of how easy it was for me to find the truth-I was raised with it. It was VEEERY easy for me to make the choices I did to attend school and to go on a mission. Why have so many people NOT been given the same type of experiences??? I know not everyone can have the same experiences.

I feel like my understanding's increased significantly BUT I'm having difficulty expressing that adequately

Awake after a looong nap-watching law and order LA from Comcast on-demand.

My friend and co-worker took me to the Spiral Jetty. She is fascinating. She is retired from working at Career Services at USU and has her Master's in Psychology. It took a long time but it didn't seem like it because the conversation was great.

Thursday I interviewed a Quaker woman for the Herald Journal. I also joined several of SHC students for wings at the Beehive Grill. It was fun although I had an overwhelming desire to dump my drink on one of the students who got the L on my nerves. Since I know I have to C him again I didn't but I'm NOT going to C him outside of school AGAIN or my drink WILL go over his head and I STILL want to do that. Hella ANNOYING!!!

Sooo I thought I didn't judge people and I've always felt good about how I treat other people BUT I said something that REALLY offended my friend and I couldn't figure out why it offended him so much. He was teasing me about hooking him up with one of my nieces but I told him I wanted her with someone strong in the church. He is overcoming all sorts of things that R pretty difficult all at once and I didn't think what I said was insensitive, BUT his reaction made me C just how insensitive it was.

He is one of the best friends I've made here in Cache Valley and I hate the thought that I made him feel bad at all.

Last night we had a VERY effective presenter who talked about sugar and bad eating habits. She was excellent!!! She had graphic examples of how sugar affects our health. Last night I committed to drinking water AND nothing else. She had a plastic representation of fat that was just gross.

It came at the perfect time for me to recommit myself to physical excellence.

There For Tomorrow is opening for Dido on Friday evening. I plan to B there and I hope I can drag a couple of friends to it 2. I paid a bill and rent 2day. I'm watching my money like a hawk right now. I want a savings and I want to eliminate my bills.

I decided to commit my goals to writing so I can check myself again with April conference to C my progress.

I want to improve my physical, spiritual and financial fitness.

Physical fitness-eat better each day but whatever I want once a week, cardio 6x a week, weights 3x

Spiritual-temple each week-make a priority!!! read scriptures and allow for enough pondering time NOT rushing!!!

Financially-grow savings again!!! accordian buget file

I'll self-check here once a month and have a detailed discussion with myself at the end of 6 months!!!

Last night I went to C my friend's band play at a Frat party. I was a little leery Bcause I have an image in my head of what frat parties R but this was nothing like that. Usually I'm in SLC on the weekend but this was a Logan weekend and I HAD to force myself to do something, ANYTHING!!!-My one and ONLY Logan friend wasn't feeling well or MAYBE she just didn't want to go to a Frat party NOT SURE yet about that.
Sooo I call my other friend-friend #2's brother to C if he's going to this thing and if I can go with him to this thing and I find out HE'S PART OF THE BAND!!! So Yes I go there by myself and I get there half an hour late but surprise, surprise I beat the band. I looked around the lobby and see stacks of the Ensign-a good sign since the party-atmosphere isn't my scene. Friend #3 is there a couple minutes after me so I'm feeling better.
Wow just wow!!! My college experience was VERY different. MayB I just hung with a different crowd because while I was happy people were NOT wild they were laid-back almost to the point of Bing asleep.
The band did great-I liked their original songs best because they were R & B which I will always love even if now I'm in a rock phase.
I remember my first party at the Y-I thought it would B lots of strong LDS boys. Boy was I wrong!-not only were several people drinking, I'm pretty sure the bedrooms were Being used for all types of immorality although since I never went there myself I can't say that definitively but I'm not stupid.
The difference??? Good music blaring-that's hip hop/rap then! AND EVERYONE dressed to impress. Last night I kept wondering if these people owned mirrors. Lots of mingling-not there!!!, lots of guys trying to run their game-uh again if it was there it must have been VERY understated. I give the one guy who did actually try to start a conversation with me credit-he came and talked to me when the band was on asking me if they were my friends. And they R by default-I was excited when the first one moved here Bcause I thought FINALLY-I'll have more than just one. BUT he blew me off which ticked me off bigtime and then the second one did the same thing when he got here and I tried to think yeah o.k. so I'm waaay older than them and hanging out with me is probably the LAST thing they want to do BUT I don't have the energy or time to get to know anyone else and they R good people so I'm going to keep trying BUT I was surprised last night that I'm still miffed. Sooo small doses right now.
New experiences R always good. I'm sure there R other crowds at USU that I wouldn't like now anyway.

When I finish work 2nite I'll B done for the weekend.Other than a meeting at the Herald Journal 2morrow at 1:30 pm I'm almost free!!! Life is great. I have so many blessings. I think it needs to be a temple night 2nite.

The tabernacle is very beautiful. I woke up at 3am this morning with my TV on and my contacts in. I took them off then tried to fall asleep but it wouldn't work. FINALLY I slept but it must have been right through the alarm Bcause when I woke up it was 9:25 and I knew Tiffany would B here to pick me up in about 10 minutes. Brushed my teeth, washed my face, threw on a dress, my sandals, put my hair up and slathered on sunscreen/moisturizer as my doorbell rang. I threw shades on and went to conference with NO makeup. Scary but since no one really knows me here I played it off.
What really stood out to me today was not really the messages shared but how the mission president and his wife's talks were in such sharp contrast to everyone else. It had nothing to do with their messages but EVERYTHING with their spirits. They radiated the light of the gospel. When they spoke their presence shone with power and authority. I don't know why I didn't feel that from anyone else but I do know I want that.
I bought a paper because I wanted to see my first story printed in the Herald Journal. They redid my lead and it was actually a lot better.
I'd like to write a lot more stories. Actually I'd like to do an editorial on the libraries in Cache Valley. I'd also like to review restaurants, beauty treatments, stores, things unique to Cache Valley.

I looove this gospel sooo much!!! It is EVERYTHING and without it is NOTHING.

2day I went to several meetings and got to listen to Elder Snow and Elder Cherrington.

I'm going to a new ward next Sunday with Tiffany. I'm excited! It should B fun.

We are like mice in a maze-we can't see the whole game. We only C directly in front of us. Although it sucks to B stuck here I probably wouldn't have figured out my AC isn't working again if I wasn't home in Logan. I also had the chance to attend our corporate meeting yesterday which I couldn't do if I was home in SLC. MayB just mayB I was supposed to B here. I'm glad my closet and laundry doors R fixed and I'm glad the AC is getting fixed. It's nice that it's not scorching hot like it was when I moved in. The heat isn't unbearable like it was. It makes me mad that the AC is out again Bcause it makes me think it never was really repaired the way it should have been.

Laaazy day here in Logan. AC repairman came, left, coming back Monday. Perhaps that's why I ended up not going home-to resolve stuff here. I need to finish my story for the Herald Journal.

Since my AC isn't working I opened my window and it's VERY windy.

This is my blogging therapy so I'm going to vent!!! I forgot about my automatic insurance payment I have set up...so...my bank account is now NEGATIVE!!! GRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!! I paid my tithing and when I do that financially I'm usually alright and I don't 4get silly stupid things like this-Y I let my account get this low in the first place is a whooole other issue I need to resolve NOOOW!!! I can't believe this happened. I had to call and cancel 2 library shifts in Salt Lake City Bcause yeah I kind of want to eat this week! Time for uber-pauper behavior like NOT eating out for the next few months. I'm not buying ANYTHING until I have at least 1000 sitting in my savings GROWING without retail interference!

Life is still good! I had an amazing time last night editing at the Herald Journal. I'm glad the people I get to work with R young. I had this idea the paper would be staffed by stodgy old geezers but thankfully I was VERY wrong about that. One of the editors is leaving on vacation to attend the Burning Man festival he's attended the past 9 years. Since I'm an Adam Lambert fan I know a little about the gathering where he had his epiphany about working to make things he REALLY wanted happen in his life.

This blogging therapy really works!!! I begin lamenting about how things suck but then I just realize how blessed I really am. I have lots of food and enough gas to get me the 3-4 blocks to work and back next week until I get paid again. This isn't how I wanted to spend most of my weekend but it'll work.

Sunday my friend from work Tiffany's picking me up for sacrament at 10am somewhere else then it's some conference? with a GA in the "Spectrum"-USU's version of the Marriot center. Later Tiffany and I get to attend a meeting about a new singles ward for people 31-45 that our current ward is forcing about half the ward to attend. The joys of not Bing married at my age never cease.

B4 I try anything for the first time I like to read reviews online. Right now I'm especially committed to discovering unique Logan establishments. Someone mentioned Crumb Brothers to me for Artisan bread and pastries. I spent time online reading reviews and Bing impressed. A man from Idaho drives to Logan regularly to buy a bunch of bread to take home and freeze until he makes his next trip. A Utah Valley customer complained about not Bing able to buy it closer to home. Someone from Park City also mentioned driving to Salt Lake City just to purchase Crumb Brothers bread.
I have to confess I don't know very much about Artisan bread. I bought some once at Costco (I know, don't judge me!)and didn't like it Bcause I could barely chew it and it didn't taste good enough for me to want to keep gnawing at the "brick." It made me feel like a dog chewing on a bone, only my satisfaction was nil.
Earlier this summer I worked as a recruiter for the census bureau. Along with a couple other recruiters we manned a booth at some home show held at the South Towne Expo center. Our booth was right next to an Artisan bread booth that sold pastries along with many different types of loaves of bread. I bought a couple pastries and WOW!!! I also bought a loaf of some type of cheese bread that was delicious. I ate about half of it that day.
Artisan pastries R incredible. Yummy AND filling. Crispy Creme donuts for example that R scrumptious in a completely different way feel deceptively light. Artisan bread should be chewy but NOT tough!!! U should be able to eat these WITHOUT exerting too much effort.
I bought a cinnamon/sugar pull-apart, a ham and cheese croissant and a cibatta loaf of bread. The verdict? Very good!!! I plan to B a frequent patron. I haven't been to Europe, I haven't tried their bread nor have I sampled Artisan bread in any other major city-sooo... I can't wax poetic like all the other reviewers did BUT I CAN say I'm going back!!!

2day after work I went to meet with people at the Herald Journal to talk about an internship so I can finish the Mass Communication degree I started at the U. When I stopped that to go to library school I had just 3 classes left. Now I need to finish 7. The HJ wants me to write stories then help them edit if I don't make the 6 hours I need to work a week.

Perfect and EXACTLY what I want to do now. They R all very nice, young, and laid-back. I'm very excited about that. It really is a blessing to B here.I didn't think I'd like it here this quickly. Opportunities open up everywhere and I looove it!!!

YES!!! I'm starting to like it here. I FINALLY got some more great-so-far restaurant recommendations-a silly thing to B concerned about at all but I feel A LOT better!!! Monday I meet with people at the Herald Journal to discuss the details of my internship. I'm WAAAY excited about that! I LOOOVE writing and I can't wait to do something there. Work is great!!!

My bishop is a sweetheart. He introduced my friend and I to these guys in our ward as secretaries. I was sooo annoyed. Like I'd really move from Salt Lake City to B a secretary. It also annoyed me Bcause of the whole dumb native thing-when I was first worked as a librarian substitute with the Salt Lake County people ALWAYS assumed I was a shelver when I had never been to that library B4. Now enough people know I'm more than capable. I guess I'm overly-sensitive BUT it never ceases to get the hell on my nerves to have to CONSTANTLY prove myself to people Bcause their initial reaction to me is that I couldn't possibly B capable of more than menial tasks because I'm not white. I know my bishop truly had the best intentions as do everyone I meet here. I just wish I didn't have to keep PROVING myself again and again. There really R nice genuine people here. I didn't get that feeling at work but then I was hired solely for my credentials and inexperience that allowed them to get someone with an MLS at a starting librarian's rate. Something I also noticed was when my friend mentioned to the bishopric that she worked at Stevens-Henager College 2 of them assumed she taught there. Her friend also went of of her way to tell me she was working on her master's degree in Speech Pathology. I just asked for her major. I could have told her I finished my master's degree in library science 2 years ago but what the L would be the point? I didn't say anything and I'm sure she thought I was awed by her intelligence-which is super but uh NOOO!!!

I need to cleave to humility Bcause I certainly don't think I'm better than anyone because I've had the chance to finish school. I'm VERRRY grateful for that-I should B married with children now working my way to eternity but I'm NOT!!! Education will make me a better wife and mother-that ONLY in combination with my testimony and the blessing it was for me to serve a mission which is Y I came to really know my Savior. It's not necessary to serve a mission to do this-if it was the Lord would require EVERY woman to do so-BUT it was life-changing to me. If everyone knew how much a mission CAN improve them-NO ONE would even consider not going.

I now have my apartment in Logan. It is nice and I looove it!!!-However-Financial surprises keep greeting me everywhere.

I can't wait to buy furniture-I just can't afford it right now. Sooo... I have this amazing job and get paid what I want-at least for now BUT I'm still scrimping and saving. MayB in September I can buy a washer and dryer-this is getting ridiculous-but it's also alright and I can handle it/deal with it. My friend from work is awesome-although I thought I'd FINALLY leave the singles ward she convinced me to attend her ward which she said is OLDER-yeah right... it's a USU ward BUT I do C a lot of older-looking people BUT I don't know if they're really older or just look older. Whatever... she is the best at work and out of work 2.

I know I need to B friendlier and make an effort to get to know more people. Sometimes though I just can't B bothered.

My nephew Matt is having his farewell this Sunday. I was also supposed to work at the Sandy library 2morrow BUT Sandy's AC is down so they R closing the library until Tuesday.

Driving when it's just the first time and not the 2nd AFTER working 10 hours makes ALL the difference in the world.

There R things I REALLY miss about Salt Lake City BUT I'm determined to get to know and LOOOVE Cache Valley/Logan too!!!

I decided to finish the 2nd Bachelor's degree in Communication I began at the U. I'm going to start with a 1-credit internship which requires 6 hours a week for 14 weeks to equal a credit hour. 1-credit costs $570 for a resident but since I've been living like a pauper for the past 2 weeks another 2 won't kill me. I'm also going to take an independent study class that'll transfer from the Y. I spoke to the Herald Journal or the Logan local paper about doing some entertainment writing. They were pretty positive. I didn't give them internship details yet but I will. For now I'll search for my Chronicle clips and a copy of that story I wrote for the Anomasima.
I'm going to focus on Logan arts and entertainment which will help me appreciate the local stuff AND help me finish a class I need.

I need 7 classes to finish this so I'm going to do it asap!!! I will take care of 2 of these this year!!!

Nice day at work!

Not feeling very good though. I drank some diet dr. pepper and ate a couple tornadoes to tide me over. Now I feel sick. Sooo NOT working for me. I need to quit eating from minimarts!!! I'm always rushed and end up eating whatever I can get quickly. NOT WORKING!!!

I looove my new job!!!

It is fun and the people I work with are super nice.

Although I am used to the drive now I have to B extra careful with what I eat. I can't eat the wrong thing or too much or I'll B sleepy on the hour and a half drive to and from work.

Something else I learned the hard way is if I forget to eat I get sleepy too. I had to drive off the freeway and drink some diet Dr. Pepper just to stay awake so I could drive home safely Friday and I ate junk food when I got home. One of mom's friends bought her a pizza and I sat there eating most of it. I'm cleaning it up 2day and 2morrow so I'll have the energy to travel safely next week.

Financially things R muuuch better 2!!!

I haven't had medical insurance in almost 2 years.

I am the new librarian at a career college in Logan-an hour and a half drive from SLC. I'm excited to start Monday. Yesterday my cold started to develop into something more. My eyes kept watering, my nose kept running and I started to lose my voice. Last night I made a half-hearted search for the vicks so I could breathe and fall asleep. Luckily my mother did the search for me. I bought some generic dayquil and nightquil from walmart.

I'm not going to go anywhere 2day or 2morrow so this is completely gone on Monday. I start at 7:30 am which means I'll have to leave at 6 am at the latest.

Time for me to finish one of the 5 books I'm reading.

So much to do, so little time.

I haven't had sugar in over a month. Xylitol, Stevia, and Malitol R my new sweeteners. I still have a bunch of Splenda. Jorge Cruise blasted Splenda in his latest book so I did some google searching and found most "experts" agree with him. I can REALLY taste sugar now since I haven't been eating it. Even in a slice of bread. I'm just drinking almond milk too. I never realized how much sugar was in milk.

I've been putting off exercise and that disrupted my sleeping patterns. My energy level is zilch without it and I know that which is part of the reason why I worked out yesterday and this morning.

Time for reflecting again!!!

April started as it always does with general conference. I looove general conference!!! I am reminded again of many things I can do to make my life easier, richer-just better!

I feel sooo grateful.

I need to B more focused on those things I need to, should do, what I truly want needs to be clearly defined so ALL my actions comply with that.

It's also the weekend of Stake Conference/Our Stake Farewell to our President Molitika Vaivaka.

Car Update: I DID NOT get the insurance matter settled the way I wish BUT I took what they did give me and bought a 2003 Ford Taurus. I got an EXCELLENT deal through scanning the KSL ads. I attempted to first talk to dealers who were NOT a good idea for me. I used to work for a dealership so I kept feeling like everything any salesman told me was a bunch of bologna. I found my car through a place in Springville-actually not even 5 minutes from Provo. It's in fantastic condition BUT it doesn't have a CD player-SOOO upset about that!!! BUT it runs well and it looks pretty. It's red but I wish it were silver. I also miss my 4WD. I wrote a demand letter to Allstate to recover the 20% they still owe me. They called me Wednesday and told me they'd let me know by 2day. So I did talk to some woman who told me she felt their adjustor did a fair job. NOOOT!!! So I am going to gain experience at small claims court.

I woke up this morning at 6:30 am jumped in the shower then went to the DMV at the fairgrounds a couple blocks from my house. I went there to get a driving record to fax to Summit County. They R CLOSED on Fridays!!! All state offices have 4-day work weeks. I wish I remembered that B4 I got up! It's going to B a looong day. 2nite our ward is performing a ma'ulu'ulu for our stake conference dance. I guess during my lunchtime I'll try to find red feathers. Then I just need some sort of taovala for 2nite. Our dance is simple and short. 2morrow our choir has to sing at our stake conference adult meeting.

I'm SLEEPY!!!

He told me I'm still 20% responsible since I didn't notice the other driver until it was too late. I am sooo SICK of this! I called George who wanted the telephone number and was LIVID!!!

Monday should B an interesting day with George. I'm glad they're taking over the rent-a-car payments.

This car business has completely overwhelmed me this week and last BUT my life is SOOO NOT about this. There R amazing opportunities and I REFUSE to let this setback paralyze me anymore. I'm sick of crying and stressing out over something I can't control. If I do EVERYTHING I can to progress as I should I just have to let go and allow my father in heaven to make up the rest. THE very basic principle of the gospel of Jesus Christ is that he will make up for our short-comings. The world never has been fair. I know that. I just wish that made this easy. It doesn't.

I'm so grateful for the scriptures, for the temple, for the leaders I've been blessed with. My father in heaven loves me very much. My car may B totaled but I didn't suffer anything physical. My mental anguish however has been hell on earth.

It may not seem like I'm letting this go but I am. This is why I dubbed this my blogging therapy. I love writing. It sharpens my focus and allows me to realize the REAL impact. It helps me grow. Exertion is required. The eternal law of the harvest persists. No pain, no gain. We reap what we sow. What is this experience supposed to teach me? One thing is certain. NEVER is this EVER going to happen to me again. I will B overly cautious and record witnesses names and telephone numbers. I will NEVER be in this position again. The officer's reassurances about NOT needing the witnesses turned out to B crap. I could tell him that but he NEVER answered his damn phone. His sergeant did the exact same thing. I wasn't doing anything wrong. Why did they all treat me like this???

The Allstate agent for the girl RESPONSIBLE for my collision, loss of work, money, time-that I REALLY DON'T HAVE!!! told me his client is only 80% responsible since I should have been able to slow down-I told him that was pretty hard with 2 lanes of traffic obstructing my view but he maintains I said otherwise. I don't remember saying that. He is completely taking advantage of me. He reminded me that he advised me to contact my insurance company to make a claim. BUT Y the L would I do that when it was COMPLETELY her fault???!!!??? Sooo he's doing this to teach me a lesson? Because I didn't listen to him? I REALLY hope that's NOT Y. He is totally taking advantage of me. He called me just B4 5:30 eliminating ANY glimmer of hope I had to get this done this weekend. They will only pay 80% of my post-collision bills. I WAS SOOO royally ticked off-BUT I am more sick of dealing with this and I just want it over asap. So I left a message telling him I just want it to be over and to let me know what I need to do to speed this up.

Since now I'll B buying an even crappier piece of metal, I'd like it already. I want to return this rent a car ESPECIALLY since it's a Toyota Corolla and the news last night ran a special about Toyotas issuing a recall because people have DIED because of some default they haven't identified yet that makes it accelerate randomly. They STILL don't know what's wrong although initially they Blieved the car mats were to blame. They fished a late model Toyota out of a lake that killed 4 or 5 people. Toyota found the floor mats in the trunk so they R at a loss as to what caused the defect.

Even with the crap this has given me I am VERY GLAD this is about over. I feel like the agent is trying to drag this out. Whatever!!!

Last Monday on my way to ward FHE in Kearns someone plowed into my car. I noticed her too late and my car is now Totaled.

THANKS A LOT!!!

I was incensed!!! Although the front of my car looks like an accordian, I didn't suffer a scratch. My brother had to remind me of how much I had to B grateful for. Instead I've been focusing a lot on hurrying the insurance company along, the police along, EVERYONE along so they can JUST cut my check and I can get another car ALREADY!!! Sooo annoying!!!

My rent-a-car's reminded me of how easy it is to drive a car vs. an suv. NO taking extra special time or care rounding the corners is nice! Time for me to drive a car again because if I bought an SUV it would have to B an even older model. I've decided to get a 2006-something. There are enough for sale throughout SLC that'll allow me to get a pretty good car. I've been combing the ksl.com ads. These are nice because they include pictures. I'm sure I'll get a boring 4-door sedan but it'll at least B reliable and good on gas.

I want this to B settled asap. My job-hunting and fitness goals have been taking a backseat to this turmoil! I can't let this keep turning everything upside down like I have been.

I'm going to hone my blogging 2! This is going to get better!

I've been thinking a lot about what I truly love and how I want to spend my life. I have a clearer vision of what gives me joy. I like interacting with people, I love variety and I like change. I love flexibility.

I'm excited for clarity. With my goal to apply for 5 different positions a day I thought about the last customer service job I had. While I did it well and enjoyed talking to and helping a variety of people, it's NOT something I'm passionate about doing. When I think about ALL the jobs I've had that I enjoyed they were NOT 9-5 jobs where I did the same thing EVERY DAY. Admittedly dancing was a job that spoiled me. I know how lucky I was to B paid to perform when I was in JR high and then high school. I had fun acting in plays in Tonga growing up and I loved being in color guard in high school. I loved missionary work, I enjoyed leadership positions, responsibility, speaking to the public, interaction. I had fun being a mentor to Pacific Islander and Asian kids. I liked giving elementary school kids tours of the circuit courts in Hawaii, I enjoyed being a church service missionary at the conference center. I will ALWAYS love sharing information about the gospel with other people.

There are enough jobs out there for me to apply JUST for things I find fascinating and I DON'T have to just work anywhere.

It's fine to B choosy, I just need to B persistent with ALL my choices and make sure each of these supports exactly where I want to B!!! Life is fabulous! We all have sooo many amazing opportunities. I am so grateful for my insight. The hardest thing about ANYTHING is figuring out what we want. Achieving it is simply a series of steps. Time for me to get stepping!

Sooo grateful and sooo blessed for sooo much! After graduating in May of 2008 I thought I'd have my full time librarian job making enough money by now to refinance my school loan into my 1st house loan BUT thanks to a hiring freeze with the County, NOOOO... now I've been out of school for over a year and a half AND I STILL have the SAME job I landed while I was STILL in school. Now I knew I'd have to pay my dues... BUT come on now!!!

My last interview with the county was for a 20-hour youth services librarian position-we had 80 applicants and at least one I know of from out-of-state. My interview went well and the manager told me how well I interviewed but that other applicants had more experience-yeah that's ALWAYS going to B true for awhile. Sub experience is great and I am so grateful for it but right now I'm sick of watching EVERY penny. I'm sooo NOOOT KIDDING about that. One $3500 car repair is all it took to throw my finances to hell. My brother told me uh U need to work a 40-hour job like "normal" people. Yeah he's right! I just thought I could handle waiting until my librarian job showed up since my car's paid off and I don't pay rent with my mother. My mother decided she's had enough of the snow and she's planning on leaving back to Hawaii. She wants me to go BUT NOOO!!! Sooo it'll B back to the real world where rent is a monthly occurence. Fine usually and I could do it provided I had no surprise repair bills from Hell.

Now it's time for me to work full time somewhere and SUPPLEMENT with librarian subbing instead of making it my main source of income. Tithing settlement helped me realize how crappy my annual earnings were and I'm just not willing to do that anymore plus with my mother leaving I need to pay rent again and I have no choice!!! I wonder what I'll be doing. I still want my Salt Lake City entertainment blog but I do need money NOW!