Urban Poly Princess

I was over the initial shock of the appearance of the baptistry. It doesn't have the same sacred feeling the Hawaii temple has just because of how it's set up. I know the same incredible work is being done there. It just isn't as nice. I don't care what anyone says, IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE HOW NICE SOMETHING IS. The spirit can be felt best if something is clean, refined and beautiful. The Hawaii temple was such a contrast to the outside world. It is part of what makes it special.

At least there is constantly work to do when you are there. I love initiatories best BUT ANYTHING where I'm not just standing there just smiling and pointing or indicating where to go is fine. I'm so grateful I have the gospel in my life. It is everything to me. It provides me with all the answers I need now although I constantly want more direction in my life. I want to work in the temple forever but I don't know how conducive child-rearing is to that. As long as my husband and I trade off. It shouldn't be a problem.

I don't feel this need to be a temple president's wife or desire that although that would be great. I want what my patriarchal blessing promises me about my husband BUT I ALSO really want him to be a mission president at some point. I think financial independence is really key to that happening sooner rather than later. I am hoping my real estate thing goes as well as I already know it can. I don't want to have any kids in any foreign countries but I don't mind raising them in one or more. I'm very grateful for my varied upbringing. I'm not afraid of many things. Of course with God nothing is impossible and I can't wait to serve him in many different capacities.

I want the Lord to use my talents fully. I know that I can serve him better if I am perfected in all areas of my life. I need to work on my physical fitness. I love to eat and that's never going to change, I just need to maximize my time by eating well for the most part AND working out consistently. Life is sooo great. We have, I HAVE sooo many blessings. I live in the greatest country in the world and I have opportunities some people can only dream of.

I don't know why I have been so blessed but I am so grateful and it is my hope that I maximize these blessings!!!

Mosiah 16

Thanksgiving was fun last night. I know my sister-in-law wants me to do Christmas again this year. I just wish my apartment had stairs inside like my townhouse did. That gave the kids hours of entertainment. I think there's some sort of playground somewhere here. I wish there were more things we could do on Christmas Day. I know the theaters are open for movies. That is definitely something I could do. What else? I suppose we could cruise downtown Logan and take pictures at the Tabernacle and then also at the temple. The lights come on in the evening too. I could serve them hot chocolate and cinnamon rolls in the evening and then several yummy dishes for lunch.

I feel Asian-food-deprived. It is time to bust that out. I REALLY want my mother to come. Maybe if I pick her up and then take her back home the day after Christmas. It was so cool to take her stuff from my couponing trips. I gave her toilet paper, paper towels, laundry detergent, candy, razors and cereal. She was so happy and I was so glad to do that. My parents have helped me so much and have always given me so much. It is about time I give them something, ANYTHING.

I told George how excited I am about Real Estate. I told him I wanted Noe and Nata to get their licenses but he said he wants them to go to school. I want that for them too I just don't see it happening right now which is why I brought it up at all. George said he wants Alisa to do it. He also wants his license. I want to make it to be very profitable so I can buy my own Mercedes.

George has the personality to do this part time and be very successful. Tonight for dinner I made a hamburger stroganoff helper with half a bag of meatballs I got for .99 a bag. I'm so grateful for my couponing group. I know that's weird BUUUT it helped me actually help my mother which is so nice for a change. Typically I'm the one that EVERYONE else in my family helps. It was so awesome to do this for a change.

Mosiah 15

I looove my nieces and nephews. They are amazing. Today we added Dance, Dance 2014 to the family karaoke thing. I hope my niece is alright. She was yelled at by people at work tonight. She didn't

They served Teriyaki and Sweet and Sour Kabobs with baked potatoes. I think kabobs go more with rice but then I think everything goes better with rice. Thank U mom!!! I stayed up turning my apartment into Christmas. It looks amazing HOWEVER I still need my couch. I have 5 strings of lights for my small tree I bought last year. I only needed 4 this year.

I decided to finish my tithing settlement with bishop since I didn't sign up and I needed to complete it. He was extremely complimentary the entire time. He always tries to build our ward members up. He asked me what I wanted to improve spiritually. I had to think. He thought I was thinking about a bunch of things BUT I had to think because I feel great about myself spiritually. I feel good about my relationship with my father in heaven, with studying the scriptures and the temple thanks to the amazing opportunity it is to work there. I finally told him I need to get married. He asked me what I needed to do to accomplish that. I told him if I knew that I wouldn't be in this ward. Then I told him I needed to lose weight and perfect my physical fitness level because it affects my spirituality too. He told me I can get healthier but that I'm not obese. He told me things that were like DUH!!! He said to look first and foremost for someone who loves god and is committed. He said it's like a business merging two companies. I then told him there was no one in the ward I was even remotely interested in. He told me it was alright and that because I want to get married situations will arise and I will recognize things I haven't before. I told him I didn't think so but yeah whatever.

Saturday was my first bride. She was gorgeous as was her husband although they looked like they weighed 80 lbs combined. Her dress was amazing. She got it online and ordered it custom-made from somewhere in China. She only had to alter the sleeves. Those are cheap too BUT her dress looked like she spent a fortune on it. I like her veil too. It was very windy outside. I looove that she slipped on these flat boots that looked like thick knitted socks under her wedding dress. You can't see her feet anyway under all that satin so at least her feet were comfy.

They had a normal amount of guests NOT the ridiculous amount with Poly weddings. I told Sis. Smoot my dream wedding would be at the Las Vegas temple with ONLY my immediate family in attendance. An Elvis-themed reception would be awesome too!!! I wonder if I could get my future husband to go along with that. It would eliminate the expense and excessive pageantry of a Poly wedding. Plus I would love to tell people I went to Vegas to get married. If there is a way to avoid having to look at roasted pigs sitting at my wedding table I am ALL for that!!! I don't think I'd have a choice if my father was still alive. I have A LOT more freedom now although I'd take the pigs if it meant having my dad back. I miss him so much and I always thought he'd be at my wedding AND around later to be the greatest grandfather to MY kids not just George's.

Mosiah 13
33 For behold, did not Moses prophesy unto them concerning the coming of the Messiah, and that God should redeem his people? Yea, and even ^aall the prophets who have prophesied ever since the world began—have they not spoken more or less concerning these things?

The Moral Force of Women - D. Todd Christofferson
I wish to express gratitude for the influence of good women, identify some of the philosophies and trends that threaten women’s strength and standing, and voice a plea to women to cultivate the innate moral power within them.
A woman’s moral influence is nowhere more powerfully felt or more beneficially employed than in the home. There is no better setting for rearing the rising generation than the traditional family, where a father and a mother work in harmony to provide for, teach, and nurture their children. 

I went to bed annoyed at bishop and just people in general. This is one of the reasons why I love Krista. She is real and not filled with these layers of hypocrisy and fakeness. She is cute and she knows she is a cute girl. She was killing me at her Chinese branch Thanksgiving party because everyone had to say what they were grateful for. The last thing she said she was grateful for was that heavenly father made her cute. The branch and I were dying. Again she reminds me of Rich my home teacher when he told the congregation he doesn't mind if he asks some girl out and she rejects him because he knows he's amazing. He reminded me so much of myself when he said that and Krista reminded me of myself too.

Rich and Krista have a lot going for them and they both know this. They are still humble. Confidence doesn't negate that. I wish my friend had that quality. Maybe it's his shyness thing. A lot of his jerky behavior can be traced to that. People who don't know Krista won't know she is confident. She is genuine, sweet and intelligent. People have this WRONG opinion of her because they judge her by surface things.

She is cute and she doesn't say a lot because she doesn't feel entirely confident with her English BUT she is also very intelligent and unlike what I think many people assume, she isn't shy. I remember when I suggested to Julie she play a piano number in sacrament meeting and my friend kept telling me to be careful about that. I kept thinking SERIOUSLY???!!!, you are trying to tell me how Krista's going to react. It may have been a big deal for him to play in church but it wasn't for her. He is a talented piano player too. What's with the nerves.

I've done a lot of things in public so I don't get nervous. I remember when I asked Krista to play for Justin's baptism. I asked her if she needed to know what she was playing beforehand or could she just play anything in the hymnbook. She told me OF COURSE she could play ANYTHING in the hymnbook. She just made me laugh. She has a testimony and she attends the temple at least once a week on her own. She wants to find her husband here. Rich told me Taiwan has very few members and thus very few options for her to consider. He told me she should stay here. Her mother wants her to stay here and work too. I'm glad she found a job. She'll be working on Icon's Chinese website. This is fabulous experience for her.

Graduate programs, ESPECIALLY an MBA program require you to present things by yourself AND in groups. I enjoyed that in my Library program. I also always tried to do something creative that still bolstered the points I wanted to make BUT at the same time made it enjoyable AND memorable. I try to do that any time I have to present something to a group of people whether that is professionally OR personally with church stuff.

Krista thought she was leaving which is why she wanted to play for sacrament meeting AND speak. I enjoyed speaking too. WE HOWEVER HAD TO ASK FOR THAT OPPORTUNITY. IT WAS NOT REQUESTED. She was too shy to ask herself BUT when I told her I'd help her make arrangements she was fine with that. I've been in this ward since its inception 3 years ago. I was NEVER asked to speak EVER and I have listened to several people give talks more than once. Krista was never asked either.

I need to sign up for tithing settlement. I need to be humble and respect bishop's position he holds even if I can't respect him. I think my first experience with bishop when he sicced Jared on me left a VERY BAD taste in my mouth. I REALLY needed help then and he didn't help me AT ALL. BUUUT I'm grateful I know the gospel is true AND I'm grateful my father in heaven was willing to help me figure things out financially.

Mosiah 12
19 And they began to question him, that they might cross him, that thereby they might have wherewith to ^aaccuse him; but he answered them boldly, and withstood all their questions, yea, to their astonishment; for he did ^bwithstand them in all their questions, and did confound them in all their words.
35 Thou shalt have no ^aother God before me.

I feel like my heart is softened and better when I read from the Book of Mormon. I have to work the early shift at the baptistry this Saturday so I need to drive back here on Friday. It'll be a day beginning at 3:30 am. She just decided to schedule me although I just did my 2 weeks of an early shift. Well, I actually missed one of my early days so I suppose it's alright. I looove working at the temple. I can't believe I couldn't work there for over a year. One day I hope I'll get why that happened.

To My Grandchildren - President Henry B. Eyring
“What choices could I make that will lead me to happiness?” And on the other hand, “What choices are likely to lead me to unhappiness?”
Whatever our personal characteristics or whatever will be our experiences, there is but one plan of happiness. That plan is to follow all the commandments of God.
From that simple statement it is not hard to summarize all I have learned about what choices lead to happiness in families. I start with the question, “What choices have led me toward loving the Lord with all my heart and soul and with all my mind?” For me it has been to choose to put myself where I felt the joy of forgiveness through the Lord’s Atonement.
 I urge those I love to accept and to magnify every calling offered them in the Church. That choice is one of the great keys to family happiness.
The pressures at every stage of life can tempt us to reject or neglect calls to serve the Savior. That can put us in spiritual peril for ourselves, our spouse, and our families. Some of those calls may seem unimportant, but my life, and my family, was changed for the better by my accepting a call to teach a deacons quorum. I felt the love of those deacons for the Savior and His love for them.
While serving others, we are most likely to plead for the companionship of the Holy Ghost. Success in the Lord’s service always produces miracles beyond our own powers. The parent facing a child in serious rebellion knows that is true, as does the visiting teacher approached by a woman seeking comfort when her husband told her he was leaving her. Both servants are grateful they prayed that morning for the Lord to send the Holy Ghost as a companion.
It is only with the companionship of the Holy Ghost that we can hope to be equally yoked in a marriage free from discord. I have seen how that companionship is crucial for felicity in a marriage. The miracle of becoming one requires the help of heaven, and it takes time. Our goal is to live together forever in the presence of Heavenly Father and our Savior.
Life in families will test us. That is one of God’s purposes in giving us the gift of mortality—to strengthen us by passing through tests. That will be especially true in family life, where we will find great joy and great sorrow and challenges which may at times seem beyond our power to endure them.
“There is not one of us but what God’s love has been expended upon. There is not one of us that He has not cared for and caressed. There is not one of us that He has not desired to save, and that He has not devised means to save. There is not one of us that He has not given His angels charge concerning. We may be insignificant and contemptible in our own eyes, and in the eyes of others, but the truth remains that we are the children of God, and that He has actually given His angels—invisible beings of power and might—charge concerning us, and they watch over us and have us in their keeping.”²
I have prayed with faith that someone I loved would seek and feel the power of the Atonement. I have prayed with faith that human angels would come to their aid, and they came.

I'm remembering again what annoyed me about Carline Sunday. She asked me if my laptop was new. I told her it wasn't, then she said it looked new. I told her the case was new and was $13 from Amazon. She reminded me of that one time I snapped at Rebecca Rawlins or rather Rebecca Powell now because she asked me if my green suit was new and I told her it wasn't. Then she said she had never seen me wear it before. I then felt like I was back in high school and I told her I could wear something different every day for a year and she'd never see the same thing twice. What is with the damn 3rd degree? Then when I answer their questions they question my answers. That is when I get ticked off because it isn't a normal inquiry it is a judgmental inquiry. Why the hell do they care. Did they want to pay for it?

Some other girl told me my nails looked good which was fine but then she immediately followed that by asking me if I did them myself. I told her the truth but I was irritated. It is like people are asking me things to judge me. I ask people where they got their nails done sometimes because I want to follow suit. I ask them where right after.

So actually I like the way he looks more. He could easily pass for mixed Polynesian. My nephew Ochi looks a lot like him. Rich is definitely Asian and fine BUUUT I am more attracted to the Poly mixed look most.

This lady Gilly??? or Jilly taught us tonight. I really like her. She is my favorite teacher. Andrea was awesome too. Water rights however was NOT my favorite and it went on seemingly FOREVER. I asked Adam why he didn't come to listen to my talk and he first said NOT in a million years BUT then he changed his tune later when I told him I tailored my talk to he and my other friend who didn't show up. He thanked me for the invite and said he had a family thing in Idaho with his sister who just purchased a home.

I NEVER expected to be learning about these rural areas and things like water rights. There's something called witch water divining???!!! Somehow people figure out where to dig for a diversion point or where to access water. At first it didn't sound right to me to call a diversion point where it seems to be the point of origin but it was much more helpful after I looked it up on Google. A world without Google now seems bleak. A diversion point is where people access a larger body of water.

I was thinking of how bishop treated me and my talk and I was annoyed today. I wish he'd get released. This is the first bishop I've ever felt this way about. Last year at tithing settlement he encouraged me to leave Logan. He IS NOT the spiritual leader I want. He can have the spirit sometimes BUT I don't respect him and I just feel like he had something to do with me not working in the temple when I wanted to do that but that is a little ridiculous. I feel like if it wasn't for him I'd be married now. BUT even if he was a factor, that's just a factor. Rich looks better, dresses better and is easier to relate to BUT he didn't have the fans my friend did who has EXACTLY the same racial background, Rich just looks more Asian. I like the way he looks more. He doesn't have the same spiritual qualities. I wish he did. I don't like the constant stream of admirers my friend had and I'm sure has primarily because he looks white. If he looked even a little Chinese that would eliminate the bulk of his fans.

Ryan in my ward is engaged. I'm so happy for him. Rachel is an RM and she is awesome. She and Ryan look great together. I've only seen them together about 2 weeks. My friend had this freaky competitive thing with him. He always found reasons to criticize him. I hope this eliminates that. I don't know what it was but I didn't like it when he did that. Ryan never criticized him. Maybe they had a bad moment although I can't think of what it might be. Ryan is a scriptorian and he is at every activity. He always attends the ward temple sessions, FHE and ALL activities. He does it because he knows it's what heavenly father would have him do. That was REALLY fast as in less than a month. Despite that I think they're great together. It makes me feel better. I am glad Ryan was blessed with someone to love that loves him AND is just as worthy and strives for perfection like he does too. It makes me feel like I can meet someone new and worthy and fall in love with them AND be happy. If it can happen for Ryan it can happen for me too!

Jilly is our teacher. We are going over legal stuff, violations
Broker's monthly reconciliation is needed and money must be moved as soon as it is earmarked as commission
$10,000 from the fund will be paid out per case
50,000 per liscensee
follow the doctrine or law of prior appropriation
www.waterrights.utah.gov

But here is the point—rather than solve the problem Himself, the Lord wants us to develop the faith that will help us rely upon Him in solving our problems and trust Him. Then we can feel His love more constantly, more powerfully, more clearly, and more personally. We become united with Him, and we can become like Him. For us to be like Him is His goal. In fact, it is His glory as well as His work (see Moses 1:39).

Because of the multiplicity of experiences and the power with which the Spirit has witnessed to me, I testify with absolute surety that God lives. I feel His love. It is the sweetest feeling. May we do what is needed to align our will with His and truly love Him. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

This is a cute Chinese branch. The couple that Krista lives with is so sweet. They are an awesome couple who attended BYU-Hawaii and had 2 of their 3 kids in Hawaii. Interacting with them made me miss Hawaii because they reminded me of home. Carline gets on my nerves even in her sweetness. She always wants to know more than she should. She asked me today how it was that Krista and I were speaking at the same time and I told her we volunteered to do that. I'm so happy for Krista. She just found a job at Icon. She told me several of her ward members also work at Icon. It happened just in the nick of time.

Bishop was crying apparently so touched by the spirit when Krista spoke. I told her I felt bad because while I felt the spirit I wasn't all choked up like him. She told me she didn't feel the spirit like that either.  I'm thinking he has some romanticized version of what and who she really is. She is strong in the church and she tries hard. She is awesome. She just finished her MBA however. This is ALSO something great. She is A LOT stronger and smarter than she might appear.

It went alright. Krista did such a great job. Her piano piece was beautiful and her talk was filled with the spirit. Deb came and I'm glad she did. From what her daughter told me she's semi-active. My non-member friend Katie from work didn't come nor did my other real estate friend Adam. I wish they came. A lot of people came up to me and told me they enjoyed my talk. Our bishop was blown away by Krista's spirit. That was nice to see.

Levi was so funny. He said he's never heard Horton Hatches the Egg before and that he was on the edge of his seat waiting to find out what happened. I hope the people that were able to listen to it enjoyed it and got out of it what they needed to glean. I wasn't as clear with the rest of the stuff I added to pound the point home although Deb really enjoyed it or at least that's what she said.

There's this Chinese ward Thanksgiving party Krista invited me to attend. It should start soon and actually I should leave now to attend it. The food better be good. I'm going to leave now.

I hate how it looks late so fast now. I fall asleep at around 3pm after I get home from going to my optometrist CLOSED!!! then my dermatologist CLOSED!!! I get a $50 rebate for buying my year-supply of contacts only they sold me 6 boxes for my "year" supply and the rebate THEY SENT ME!!! says you need to buy 8 boxes. No biggie but why sent me the damn rebate AND receipt for 6 when it requires an 8-box purchase???!!! They are selling me a couple more. These are $40 a box and I need to still spend about $700 before the end of the year.

I also went to the library to borrow some Dr. Seuss books. I'm reading at least 1 story during my talk tomorrow. Horton Hatches an Egg seems the most appropriate for continually holding to the iron rod BUT I thought I'd read a few I'm not familiar with too.

I woke up about an hour ago and it was still dark.

Mosiah 10

This is the talk I decided on after skimming over a bunch of them. It hasn't been long enough for me to be super familiar with all of the general conference speeches but this one to me has the most promise. I wanted something with enough general principles for my friend Katie who isn't LDS to feel uplifted. Deb is LDS so I'm not super concerned with her. I didn't want to speak about anything heavy on chastity or marriage in case my friend Adam comes. I hope he does but I think he lives in Smithfield or Richmond which is a little farther than he might want to commute for a friend he doesn't really know and I don't know how comfortable he is attending church anyway. I don't doubt he was probably raised in the church. I want him to feel the spirit again. That should hit him pretty easily if he hasn't been there in awhile. AGAIN, there is no way to reconcile his life choices but I want all my friends to feel the spirit and know how much their father in heaven loves them whatever they choose to do or not.

Jesus Christ is real and this is his church. A fullness of joy can only be received through its ordinances and through his atonement. I want to use this talk to illustrate and outline the principles he shares BUT I want to focus on CHOOSING to improve, to learn, to grow. NOT just reacting in appropriate ways. While we must continually hold fast to the iron rod, God doesn't want us to just withstand circumstances, he wants us to create these. A small seemingly insignificant choice can result in countless eternal blessings or lost opportunities.

One of my classmates posted a picture from high school. It made me think of that time. I felt out of place in everything. In Tonga where we just left I was the top of my class EVERY quarter. My friends were also from the U.S., New Zealand and Australia. It was weird to be in Hawaii again. My parents didn't have money to spend on us, I was placed in all these GT classes with mostly the white BYU-Hawaii faculty kids who treated me like I was stupid. I hung out with the Tongan crowd BUT they were VERY unlike the Tongan crowd in Tonga. Strange. I think I just had identity issues. Dancing at PCC was something I loved but even then I never really enjoyed the many friends I made then until I went to BYU where although I hung out exclusively with Polynesian people I could relate well to them AND I had fun with them.

None of them however was really strong in the church. I had a blast and ward-hopped, went dancing and had Poly guys paying for EVERYTHING for me ALL the time. It was sweet!!! While I had fun I did not care about school and my grades reflected it. My parents wanted me to go home since I was failing out of school. Instead I thought about how much fun it would be to move to Washington with my friend Christie who is full Tongan from Salt Lake City. She was a model there and loving life in Seattle. She was always a great friend although she didn't have a problem with sleeping with men. As I thought about how much fun I'd have with her in Washington I read my patriarchal blessing. One line instructs me to listen to my parents and not to venture in areas that would cause them great displeasure.

When I returned to Hawaii I was HAAATING life. I met nice good LDS boys who were students at BYU-Hawaii BUT didn't have cars OR money. I hung out with my cousin and we hit up Waikiki but SHE or I drove because they were poor BYU-Hawaii students with no vehicle OR money. Memories of men paying for EVERYTHING were sooo a thing of the past. Local men were so NOOOT an option for me. Local boys didn't take kindly to my love of decking out and most couldn't relate to anything I was interested in anyway. BYU students were my best social option BUUUT AGAIN, I lived at home and had my own car. They didn't have ANYTHING.

I think I've done more than enough reminiscing.

Continually Holding Fast - Elder Kevin S. Hamilton
His father left the church when he was 13 by missing sacrament meeting with his parents who decided to go on a country drive instead. That decision led to many of his family members losing their membership and blessings in the church. Later Elder Hamilton's father met and married his mother who  helped him return to and raise his family in the church.

Because his father left the church first by missing sacrament meeting, Elder Hamilton is especially sensitive to the importance of attending all our meetings.

Regularly attending our church meetings is one way we can hold fast. Continually holding fast is a reference to the prophet Lehi's vision of the tree of life. He saw groups of people trying to get to a tree. Some people let go of the rod and were lost, they did not make it to the tree of life. Other people made it and even ate the fruit. Despite this people mocked them and they were ashamed so they left the tree. FINALLY there were people who we "Continually Holding Fast" who ate the fruit and ignored people who criticized them. They continued to move forward as they continued to hold on.