Urban Poly Princess

Right after work today I fell asleep. I thought I could fall asleep again after taking out my contacts but after tossing and turning for 30 minutes I decided to get online. Tomorrow is ward temple night in Bountiful. I can always use it when it comes around and I like supporting the ward. I also like seeing who actually does come to ward temple night. I wish David was coming but he isn't. I wish he answered me but I guess he doesn't feel comfortable writing me more about his conversion. I want the REAL story NOT the fellowshipping one-although fellowshipping is extremely important, I just want the CONVERSION story. I know he's converted, I just want to know the circumstances behind that. He told me why he is in Logan so I definitely know he courts the spirit and guidance and actively uses it in his life. He wouldn't work in the temple each week if he didn't have the testimony I know he has. FINALLY he has the divine stamp of approval-much more than I think is warranted-BUT I'm certainly not privy to the insight my father in heaven has. I used to wish I had a dramatic conversion story, now I'm grateful for what I experienced. Thinking now about how different our lives were, Heavenly Father did not tempt either of us beyond our capacities. He didn't allow me to go inactive-I could have easily fallen into the party scene without a testimony firmly in place. David didn't because that wasn't the person he was. Neither of us was placed in situations we couldn't handle well.
I don't doubt how he feels about me at all which is why although I was livid at fhe, I'm trying to be Zen. I know he doesn't have a lot of dating experience so I am trying to give him a break.-OK NOOO-It has never ultimately mattered how you feel about someone-what actually matters is what you are willing to do about it-I'll just B real-the spirit is the ONLY thing working here. As long as I've known David I've been brought repeatedly to the point that I don't want to deal with him at all. That is the real reason for all the stupid drama in our friendship. I'm glad not to have it although my diva prima donna attitude makes that VERY easy for me to bring back. This is a weakness I know I have so I suppose it's good I get to constantly have it stretched. We aren't dating and that's actually what the hell I wanted in the first place-to be his friend AND get to know him better-THEN EVENTUALLY actually date him. He needs to think about how he feels when the positions are reversed. Sooo we had Katie, Camila, that long-haired vet girl, and then Jonny who showed up late. I looove Jonny she is my VT partner. I'm not sure what he's doing. He knows what he's supposed to do. Entertaining other options is just stupid to me and a waste of people's time. Trifling with women to stroke your own ego is NOT cool. I'm not sure why his friend Deborah from Maryland didn't show up or Heidi-her friend. Deborah is a friend he had when he was just returning to church. She should value that more. HOWEVER-If he thinks it is appropriate to maintain ANY close female friendships when he finally dates exclusively he needs to wake up or rather just consider how he feels when the positions are reversed.