Urban Poly Princess

Someone from India hacked my account meaning I had to change my password. There's nothing to gain from doing that so I don't know why people do that. My credit sucks so they wouldn't want to steal my identity. There's just nothing in my email that anyone would want to look at anyway.

A couple of my friends asked me if I was hacked. I wonder if my account sent people on my friends' list strange things. Hopefully my password change will help but I don't know how they figured out my initial password in the first place.

I'm eating some of my enchiladas for breakfast. I didn't really think but I won't have to cook this week since I am only working 2 days. Maybe that's why I never got into the cooking groove. I am going to see if Lori can get me my list for next module by tomorrow since I won't be here from Wednesday through the rest of the week.

Mark's dinner is Friday at 5pm. Should I be suspicious? I can make plans for something that night to avoid having to come up with an excuse OR maybe I should just go. I don't have a boyfriend. I do know who I should be with BUT he hasn't done anything about that. Even if my other friend/future wasn't a factor I don't want to go out with my FRIEND Mark. If he just asked me out I'd say no. BUUUT what the hell do I do if he does it there at dinner? That's not really fair. Do I say no in front of the sisters? I don't want to do that. I can go if he does ask me out on a date. He's not Poly so he shouldn't become a clingon if I do go on a date with him. I'm over-thinking this and he probably won't ask me out anyway.

My friend has dated most of the girls in our ward and then flirted with everyone else. Physically Mark is the best. Russ had the complete package as does my friend save the attitude. There was a time when my height obsession made it so I wouldn't date ANYONE under 6 '1. Mark could look like a model in the right clothes. Spiritually he's great BUT I don't like his reluctance to commit himself to ask his friends to hear the discussions.

He's intelligent enough BUT he stopped going to school and he doesn't have even an undergraduate degree. I think he'd be happy and content to make under 50,000 a year and live in Cache Valley for the rest of his life. That is NOT the life I choose for myself OR my family. My brother and the rest of my extended family would have a VERY hard time with that. I hate it myself. He served in London which is why I don't get his lack of desire to get out of Logan. There's nothing wrong with that. It just isn't me.

Mosiah 7
16 And now, king Limhi commanded his guards that they should no more bind Ammon nor his brethren, but caused that they should go to the hill which was north of Shilom, and bring their brethren into the city, that thereby they might eat, and drink, and rest themselves from the labors of their journey; for they had suffered many things; they had suffered hunger, thirst, and fatigue.

I just have a feeling the suffering spoken of here was severe. Nikki's talk about trek reminded me of how blessed we are to live at a time when we don't have to rough it. I remember girls camp happened right when our family first returned from Tonga. My family didn't have money to pay the fee to send me to the ward girls camp. I pretended I didn't want to go although at the time I actually wouldn't have minded going. They told everyone that if they didn't have the money to just let them know and arrangements would be made so EVERYONE could attend. Yeah right! Like I really wanted to do that. My dad worked at PCC with the props guys. HE DID THAT WHEN HE ATTENDED BYU-HAWAII!!!

Later he worked as the supervisor for night security. This was good because he let me attend BYU-dances since he or one of his crew was always working the dances. It was nice to know where to find my father when I needed him at BYU-Hawaii. It was good when I danced at PCC because I could find him after night show too BUT I know the pay sucked ALTHOUGH I didn't really feel that since I was working and just had to pay my own gas. My dad took care of my insurance. So gas and shopping were what my checks went to pay. 

I didn't like my dad working security however because he was too culturally grounded and had absolutely no qualms about becoming violent with anyone. He forgot how old he was. My dad was 5 '10 AND OVERWEIGHT BUT he beat up this 6 '3 muscular Tongan guy who was in George's class because he hit one of his smaller Asian security guards who stopped his girlfriend from doing something. I was especially worried about him when this happened. Finally later some white faculty kids mouthed off to my father. He slapped one of them hard on the face. He was asked to work in the facilities department instead. He didn't want to do that so he returned to what he really loved, construction.

When he got his contractor's license again life was MUCH better financially BUT it was also feast or famine and my mother worked at the temple answering the telephone which was voluntary. They offered her a paid position and she refused it saying she didn't feel right taking money from the temple for something she enjoyed.   

I REALLY miss my dad. He treated me like a princess and is the REASON why I expect that. I NEVER thought that would ever be an issue for me.