Urban Poly Princess

I think my father in heaven REALLY loves me because I've gone through all of these different stages in a matter of days. BUT now that the dust has cleared I can look at things without getting caught up in how hurt I am feeling, or how angry I am. I will work on being David's friend because that is what I should do as a disciple of Christ. I will be kind when I see him again whether he responds nicely or not. I will be friendly despite how he may treat me.

However, this experience has allowed me another peek at David's character and how he values he values people. This is a blessing. Do I want a friend who sees the worst in me all the time? He told me we couldn't be friends. NO ONE has EVER told me that before. What is he 5???!!!

I don't like how he treats women in general. I think he leads women on or he wouldn't have the devoted and large following he has accumulated. He didn't lead me on. Instead he treated me like a dog when I first met him and now he's manufacturing reasons to take offense and find fault. He knows me well enough to know I'd never do what he's accused me of doing. I know Jonni attended fhe the other night just to see him and she was hanging around after to chat with him. I'm sure there are more I didn't notice.

I am such a sucker for an intelligent man with a pretty face BUT I've always known what matters most is how you treat people. I can't psych myself out to feel great. I am sad that my friend is the way he is AND I am his friend even if he isn't mine. Despite this I am grateful-it is my blessing he never dated me-I love him a lot now which is why this hurts so much. If I did date him I would've fallen in love with him AND been a basket-case if he pulled something like this and I'm sure he would've done that sooner or later. Losing a friend is always easier than losing a boyfriend.