Urban Poly Princess

I had to tell President Peck about my aunt. I don't have any feelings of love for her. I know this isn't right. I know I need to turn it over to my Savior. He told me to specifically let the atonement work for me in this. He suggested that maybe that's why I lost my recommend so I can work on this. He asked me to pray about this tonight. He still signed my recommend and I agreed to pray and work on it. He told me it won't come all at once but that it will come. He told me my aunt is a child of God. I told him I wasn't sure about that. He just laughed at me. I know he's right.

How can my aunt be so rude to my mother and then go and watch her son get sealed in the temple by her husband? Isn't it obvious to her how wrong that is? The spirit needs to knock some sense into her.

David works at the temple. I hope the spirit slams him in the worst way. I was over this. Why did he have to remind me of what a jackass he is? He was deliberately dishonest with me. He needs to take a break from the temple because he sure as hell isn't worthy to be there. Are you honest in your dealings with your fellowmen? That would be a humungous NOOO!!! When I work at the temple I hope I NEVER see him there. It would be great if they both just spontaneously combusted. Both David and my aunt worry more about what other people think than what their father in heaven thinks of them.

I do need to let the atonement work on me for my fake aunt AND David. Right now I wish for bad things to happen to both of them. I know that's wrong. I know I need to pray about this. Maybe that's why I didn't get my interview until tonight. I needed to have David be his idiot self and treat me like a dog so I can deal with my ill feelings instead of just ignoring them.

I can do this. Right now I don't want to do anything but curse them like a witch. I'm glad President Peck said it wouldn't happen all at once. It's going to take at least some gorging on ice-cream first and a lot of prayers just to desire to overcome these challenges.