Urban Poly Princess

I was thinking about Kinau yesterday because he changed his Facebook picture to the one with his adorable nephew. He looks amazing in it too. He is Noelani's classmate which makes him 47 or 48 so not as bad as I was first thinking. Noe told me she thinks he's gay. She told me this when we were discussing our nephew she told me is gay. She was talking about how he was always James growing up but that he became Kinau here in Utah.

I've always had good friends who were gay. They enjoy the things I do - clothes, looking good, musicals, good restaurants. My brother loves good restaurants at least. I don't want someone who is gay. I don't want to be the girl they hope rescues them from this tendency. Kinau is an RM and strong in the church so I don't think that would be a concern. I like that I know he'd make an incredible father AND that he has the money and time to spend with me and our children if we had any. I don't like the MLM thing although I know that's what's given him the time and money.

It made me think also of Lars Moleni. I knew him when he was immature before his mission which is why I could never go there with him BUUUT he has the BEST family. He is the only one who is single he's not bad looking although I was never attracted to him. He graduated from UCLA which I like and he is the best singer. The Moleni's have several church CDs out. They sound amazing although they've never seen the commercial success the Jets have. I know my brother would looove it if I hooked up with him so he could sing with him all night at family get-togethers .

His sisters and parents are all intelligent gorgeous and spiritual. They are all amazing women. One of his brothers is married to a good friend of mine who is also amazing intelligent gorgeous and spiritual. She just got her RN with six kids. I would have the absolute best in-laws ever. I don't know why I never felt it for Lars. I even love his name. I think he's doing a stint in the military now. He once told me he wanted to go to law school which again I love. We were in the same Tongan Singles ward before. He would've gone there too. I feel like I'd be settling if I married him although there's no logical reason for me to feel that way. I'm just strange. I just can't seem to shake the first impression he made. I don't know may people before their mission. I know that's not fair. I know he's not that person anymore. I had an awesome friend that liked him before his mission. I set them up on a date for her but he was so immature and irresponsible then. When I was president of the Polynesian club at the U we held a formal Winter Ball. He agreed to sing there for me and to be my friend's date. I told him to get her a wrist corsage and I could tell he had no clue so I told him I'd get it for him which I did.

He was the perfect date and I never told her I did that. She tried to arrange things with him after that but he was immature and extremely flaky and he was never interested in her. Now she's married to someone nice and has 5 children. Lars went on his mission and is still single like me. I know his mother and family would be fine if we hooked up but they want me to feel it too and while I love his family it's just not there. Lars deserves someone who can appreciate how great he is. I don't know if my vision is just forever clouded by knowing him well before his mission when he had no sense of responsibility whatsoever. His brother told me he was a zone leader. I know he's changed. I don't think I could marry someone for their family although his is EXACTLY what I want.

AND this is why I'm still single. Lars and Kinau are both better than ALL the guys in my ward. My friend is the only person I've met here who I wouldn't feel like I was settling with BUT I don't want him if he feels like he'd be settling to be with me. I've never felt he doesn't like me BUT something is holding him back whatever that is I don't really care but I don't want to settle anymore than I want someone to settle for me. Whoever I end up with has to be just as excited to be with me as I am. I know exactly how amazing I am. I know I'm intelligent, spiritual and gorgeous.  If he really is paralyzed by shyness I don't want that either. You can't be an effective leader in the church or to your family if this is something you allow to deny you of what is most important.

I hope there is someone amazing that I just haven't met yet. I trust my father in heaven will guide me to that person. I just have to do my part and work towards perfection each day. It is fun to progress and strive for eternal life each day. I'm glad he made it that way. I am so blessed and grateful for so many things.